Tuesday, September 29, 2009

I'm laughing, I'm crying...ok, there's really more crying.

My son has discovered Jesus.

There are those of you who are thanking God right now that I have actually managed to pass on something worthwhile to the poor boy...screw you guys, it was an accident.

He is going to a private, Catholic kindergarten. Right, now pick yourselves up off the floor, stop laughing and pay attention to the rest of the sordid story.

Prior to his induction in this most sacred institution (I totally wrote 'scared' the first time i tried to type sacred, hee hee) his idea of Jesus Christ was...and I quote...

"Jesus Christ is a swear word and when you say it, you get nailed to a cross and then crucified"

Then beer came out of my nose and I yelled "Je-sus Christ! Where did you hear that?!"
Yep. Mom of the Year. That's me. I know you are all so very proud.
Now, before we have to have a religious discussion, let me say that I'm am not proud of that, so much as unhappy that I couldn't place all the blame squarely on my husband"s head...continuing on with my story...

Enter Catholic School and now every time I turn around, Jesus is upset with me over something. I just can't catch a break. Evidently, that guy is EVERYWHERE (or so I'm told)

Recently, AJ got sent home from school. I had sent him to his room, so as to make "day at home with Mommy" less of a reward, when i heard him talking...

"Dude, who are you talking to?"

"I'm talking to Jesus."

"Really. Well, what does Jesus have to say?"

"He says that he is a little disappointed in you."

"In me? Really? Why would he be disappointed in me?"

"Because you are mad at me for getting sent home from school."

"I would think he would be more disappointed in you for getting sent home from school."

"yeah, well - Jesus loves me. My teacher said so"

*silence*

(mumble, mumble)

"that is Jesus' last name Mommy, you aren't supposed to say it like that"


We were going along fine after that. Well, not really - he is having a horrible time at school. Not with learning, he is reading, writing, adding and telling time - not bad for kindergarten...but he can't sit still or pay attention or listen to his teachers. He talks and makes noises in class, runs away and tears up his work with little or no provocation.

So, I guess I shouldn't really be too surprised that he was "suspended" today. I really had no idea they could do that to a 5 year old. They may let him back if we can come up with a plan with a pediatrician. (Secretly, I think that means after we medicate him)

I was so very against those types of medications, especially for a child so young...but I'm trying to be open minded I'm trying to think of what is best for my beautiful boy. He has to be so unhappy, he knows we aren't happy with his behavior and yet it never changes. We haven't had a "good day" in longer than I can remember.

I just want him to have a good life - to be happy - to have friends - for others to see him like I do, not just as a problem.

Do any of you have any experience with this? any advice? Any way to get Jesus off my back?


TwitThis

Labels: , , , at 8:03 PM

7 love letters:

  1. I don't really have any advice for the Jesus part..

    But I just had a convo with the psychologist for the little foster kid in our home. And I was BLOWN away with what the guy was telling me. Not really helping me solve the problems.. but at least helping me see into the kid's brain ya know!?

    Have you been to a therapist.. not for drugs.. but to learn how his brain works??

    I have such a hard time believing what you are saying after our afternoon with him???
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  2. Since we don't have kids yet, I don't have any amazing advice for you. But, I do hope that things get better and that he is able to have some good days. Soon.

    The whole Jesus story had me laughing...it was awesome.
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  3. i have no advice as to how to get jesus off your back... can't seem to get him off mine! lol

    however, as for school.... k, i'm going to try to make this short....

    call your school district and have him tested! they can place him in an appropriate setting. (as much as i'm sure catholic school is great, it's not appropriate - obviously, if he's being sent home.)

    you do not need to medicate him in order to "fit him in" to their classroom, there's a place where he already will fit in.

    thankfully i had trinity tested by the school district very early and she was placed at an autistic school at 2 1/2 and she's been there since, and it's wonderful!

    already being suspended at 5 years old is just setting him up to hate school. if your school system can't accommodate him, BY LAW they have to send him somewhere that can - including providing the transportation. he needs an IEP. individualized education plan.

    even still, be prepared to advocate like hell.

    if you need any more info, let me know. :)
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  4. Yeah, living in a small town we had to do small private (read Christian) kindergarten where Max got some Jesus in him, too. It's evened out a bit over the years apres-indoctrination, but I do remember him asking "If Daddy dies do we praise him?" Oye.

    Now re: the meds. email me please. Seriously.

    Tsunami turned out to be a slight rise in the coastal waters, but no flooding or other trauma. Whew!
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  5. Good luck with Jesus, he pops up at my house when I misbehave too. DAMN!

    We have gotten the "need to see your pediatrician" lecture too. Ticks me off big as life. They cannot handle her so they want me to drug her. NOT! She is bored because they are talking above her. She needs help and if I let them-she will not get any help till she falls far enough behind.

    We gotta be an advocate for them...although sometimes it is just easier to swear!
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  6. That story cracked me up :).

    About the meds, I agree with what's already been said about having him evaluated to see if a different placement might work out better for him. Also, is he receiving any OT (occupational therapy)? My twins have sensory issues that result in hyperactivity (sensory-seeking), being easily distractable (they notice sounds / sights / smells to the point of distraction that most people can tune out and it can make focusing in the classroom difficult), etc. One in particular was having a really hard time in school and it was suggested that we medicate him, but he had just started OT so we wanted to give that a chance first. It really helped him, as did getting the appropriate support in school (picture schedules, seating near the front of the room so there's less between him and the teacher to distract him, the ability to have "sensory breaks" during the day as needed, etc.).

    I know from some of our friends' experiences that medication can be helpful when the cause is ADHD but when it's sensory-related behavior I don't think the medication is really helpful. I don't know your son, so I don't know what specifically is happening with him, but just wanted to share our experience as something to consider. Feel free to email me if any questions.
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  7. You've gotten great advice here, and hey, where have you been? Homeschooling is the best option, but you are working, so can't do that. A good private school might be needed. At 11, Adam has just started one. Now, he can handle it, but when he was younger he needed to run when he was processing information. Asperger's doesn't mean stupid, mine can talk circles around me. It's a question of putting them in an environment that works for them.Alex needs a way to get that kinetic energy out so that he can settle. You need to have long talks with whoever is educating him and work this out to everyones satisfactioas. It will get easier as he gets older.
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