not too sticky...

2010-11-20T16:09:00.000-08:00

My poor child, waiting for me to get done working...
What a sad, sad life.
(except for the 3 orders of fries he demanded)

So here's the thing...

2010-11-19T13:43:00.000-08:00

There was this thing I used to do...

This blog I used to have...

I was pretty faithful about writing and visiting all of my friends...

Then suddenly - life interfered.

Everything was crazy. Everything was hectic. Everything was a crisis.

Whew...

What a long year...

So, I wised up. Took a deep breath, took control and said enough.
Enough drama. Enough racing around and getting nothing done. Enough being broke and never seeing my child...

Then I bought a restaurant.

???

I know. Crazy, huh?

So, here it is - Friday afternoon and we are getting ready for a snow storm. I'm sitting in my lovely kitchen and suddenly I wanted to blog and tell anyone who might still be listening - all about it.

Isn't it cute? There is a little fireplace in the corner and a few more tables...i love it.

My life is still busy and crazy, but I'm much happier with it. Little man is in a good school and doing pretty well. I just got him in an after-school program, so he doesn't have to sit here all afternoon with me.. How many french fries can one boy eat, anyhow?

Oh, it's called the Lazy Day Cafe. If you are so inclined, we have a page on Facebook that you can join and see what specials and things are cooking. We are still working on our web page...

Let me know what you think. I will post the menu soon too...

why are we so stupid?

2010-05-06T15:09:00.000-07:00

We all want love.
We all want to be loved.
To be wanted, adored, needed...desired...
We understand it.
We recognize that we aren't reasonable about it, we know we open ourselves up for hurt in our quest for find happiness...

and yet...

and yet - it still comes back and bites us in the ass.

For those of you freaking out because I'm married - I know, I know - I'm not talking about myself...

I have a friend ( yes, very funny, I know! I'm STILL not talking about me) and she's having a really hard time. Yes, she knows this man was no good for her. yes, she knows (somewhere deep, deep inside) that he is a giant piece of shit and in no way worthy of her tears and angst...

She knows, because we all told her -and she's not stupid - she knows and yet she hurts and it kills all of us that we have to sit back and watch her suffer.

Why do we torture ourselves? Why do we hurt ourselves over people who, not only aren't worth it, but we know are bad for us? There isn't anything I can say to my friend to make her feel better, except to tell her that we love her, that she's worthy of better...and still she cries.

She is so afraid (after 16 years of a horrible, awful marriage) that no one will ever love her for herself. It's so sad that we allow these small, narrow-minded, self-absorbed fuckers (excuse my language) to make us feel less that we are - less that we deserve...

Here's to all my girlfriends - to every woman who has ever let a crappy man make her feel less than what she is and has suffered for someone else's crap.

I love you Sweetie...You rock!

Life in the slow lane...or at least the sticky one

2010-04-27T10:52:00.000-07:00

My goodness, I'm not sure I even remember how to blog. Certainly, I'm having issues re-learning to type on the computer. All I ever use any more is my Blackberry and it has auto correct - so any miss-punctuation, etc - I'm sorry.

This has been a crazy 10 months. I won't recap. Crazy covers it, but it still isn't very exciting...

What I will do is tell you where we are now...

We live In Salt Lake City - actually a suburb of said city - in a lovely rental. (OMG, I miss my house and my kitchen). But it is a real house and we are much happier than before. My little man, who has had such a harder time than we have, is attending public school and doing really well. Most of the problems he had after attending his previous "school" have disappeared and he is adjusting pretty well. He was officially diagnosed with Autism in February, so he is getting help in his school. They are really wonderful with him and it makes me so happy that he's enjoying school for a change. Evidently, keeping him out of school for four months didn't hurt him too much academically, he is still ahead of his class. He does still have issues with being able to stay in his class the whole time, but he has a safe room for when he's over-whelmed. They are really good to him there. It eases my mind so much.

Hubby is working. A good job with decent benefits and he actually gets a paycheck! Score one for our team.

I hopefully haven't complained too much about my job (whining is So unattractive). I am still working there. Its quite a commute, but I am getting paid and can (kind of) set my own hours...so it isn't all bad.

I don't know...it has been such a long journey to get here. But 'here' doesn't seem so bad right now. Hubby says "everything happens for a reason". So I guess there is a reason for this trip, lets just hope the painful part is over for now...

Missed you all.

Missed your voices, your stories, your support.

Here's to a new chapter - Sticky's back!

Wake me when it's Tomorrow

2010-01-22T11:53:00.000-08:00

Ever have one of those days...?

You know the one I mean - by the time you realize you should have just stayed in bed, it's way too late to do anything about it?

Yeah, that's the day I'm having.

It is Friday, tho'. That's a good thing, right?! Doesn't the weekend make everything better...?

I'm having cooking withdrawals. i just don't get to cook like I used to and I miss it.

And the ocean. I miss the ocean.

And, evidently, I should miss having anything interesting to write about. Just sitting here, staring at the screen and everything sounds whiny and boring. Maybe I just need a little mental vacation...visualize warm sandy beaches...fruity drinks with little umbrellas...half naked cabana 'boy'...

Sigh

I used to have this blog...

2010-01-18T13:25:00.000-08:00

A long, long time ago...in a galaxy far, far away...

I used to have thoughts that had nothing to do with work or children. I used to cook and garden. I used to write and chat with my friends. Sigh. I never used to get 150 text messages a day about scheduling, menus, money, service and promotions. I never used to feed my kid fast food and use cartoons to babysit. I never used to leave him with "strangers" (ok, not really strangers, but not me and not school) five days a week. I never used to come home at 9 or 10pm five nights a week. I never used to miss being a mom (and a wife) so much.

I need a change. Nothing is worth missing my family. Nothing is worth the look on my boy's face EVERYDAY when I leave for work and when I come home. Nothing is worth the tone in my husband's voice when he asks how late I have to work "this time".

I want my family back. I want my home back. I want my life back.

So, I'm doing it. I'm making a change and taking control. Wish me luck...

I don't even know if it's bad news or good news anymore...

2009-10-10T22:21:00.001-07:00

Its official.

We got booted out of Catholic School. And it wasn't even for bad Jesus jokes.

It was done very nicely, of course. They weren't rude. But it was clear they were very happy to see us go.

They suggested some sort of ADD drugs, or that I could pay for a full time aid in AJ's classroom (at $10 an hour), but without one of those things, they were unable to handle him. So much for the expensive private school.

We went to our new pediatrician. She is actually very helpful and understanding. She agreed that we should pull him out of the Catholic school until we get some testing done to find out exactly what his problems are and how to properly address them, not just throw drugs at him until he follows direction. We agreed that his self esteem is suffering (he asked the Dr. for new DNA, because his is making him bad) and she added that he is too far ahead of public school kindergarten to put him there right now.
His behaviors would probably get worse if he's bored with the curriculum.

The bad part is that we can't get in for a pre-testing meeting until December 7th. That's a really long time to be out of school. I'm at a bit of a loss... I have homework and things that we study at home, but he doesn't get a any interaction with other kids.

I'm so torn. I'm happy to have him out of a school that didn't want him, I'm happy that we are getting tested at the Children's Hospital, but I'm so sad that this has to be so hard. It's kindergarten...it just shouldn't be this way. I just want people to see the bright, funny, smart, wonderful boy that I see everyday (Bad DNA, or not!).

Anyone have any ideas? I've gotten so much great advice here, but I haven't been at this extreme before. I do have a meeting set with the school board here, but I'm a little reluctant to put him into a new school now, when we might have to change again after the testing...help!
Sent via BlackBerry from Cheri

I'm laughing, I'm crying...ok, there's really more crying.

2009-09-29T20:03:00.000-07:00

My son has discovered Jesus.

There are those of you who are thanking God right now that I have actually managed to pass on something worthwhile to the poor boy...screw you guys, it was an accident.

He is going to a private, Catholic kindergarten. Right, now pick yourselves up off the floor, stop laughing and pay attention to the rest of the sordid story.

Prior to his induction in this most sacred institution (I totally wrote 'scared' the first time i tried to type sacred, hee hee) his idea of Jesus Christ was...and I quote...

"Jesus Christ is a swear word and when you say it, you get nailed to a cross and then crucified"

Then beer came out of my nose and I yelled "Je-sus Christ! Where did you hear that?!"
Yep. Mom of the Year. That's me. I know you are all so very proud.
Now, before we have to have a religious discussion, let me say that I'm am not proud of that, so much as unhappy that I couldn't place all the blame squarely on my husband"s head...continuing on with my story...

Enter Catholic School and now every time I turn around, Jesus is upset with me over something. I just can't catch a break. Evidently, that guy is EVERYWHERE (or so I'm told)

Recently, AJ got sent home from school. I had sent him to his room, so as to make "day at home with Mommy" less of a reward, when i heard him talking...

"Dude, who are you talking to?"

"I'm talking to Jesus."

"Really. Well, what does Jesus have to say?"

"He says that he is a little disappointed in you."

"In me? Really? Why would he be disappointed in me?"

"Because you are mad at me for getting sent home from school."

"I would think he would be more disappointed in you for getting sent home from school."

"yeah, well - Jesus loves me. My teacher said so"

*silence*

(mumble, mumble)

"that is Jesus' last name Mommy, you aren't supposed to say it like that"

We were going along fine after that. Well, not really - he is having a horrible time at school. Not with learning, he is reading, writing, adding and telling time - not bad for kindergarten...but he can't sit still or pay attention or listen to his teachers. He talks and makes noises in class, runs away and tears up his work with little or no provocation.

So, I guess I shouldn't really be too surprised that he was "suspended" today. I really had no idea they could do that to a 5 year old. They may let him back if we can come up with a plan with a pediatrician. (Secretly, I think that means after we medicate him)

I was so very against those types of medications, especially for a child so young...but I'm trying to be open minded I'm trying to think of what is best for my beautiful boy. He has to be so unhappy, he knows we aren't happy with his behavior and yet it never changes. We haven't had a "good day" in longer than I can remember.

I just want him to have a good life - to be happy - to have friends - for others to see him like I do, not just as a problem.

Do any of you have any experience with this? any advice? Any way to get Jesus off my back?

ick

2009-09-26T21:51:00.000-07:00

On a stranger note...

I love you Jason Statham, I really do. But Crank 2 was just awful. Sorry.
I finally get a night off and this is what you give me? Even the sight of your naked ass couldn't make this movie any better.

OMG, I'm So happy!!! (you guys Rawk!)

2009-09-22T14:21:00.000-07:00

So, I wrote that whiny blog post on Saturday...

But I was feelin' pretty good, because it had been so long and I have missed you all SO much. I didn't even realize until yesterday that I hadn't gotten any notifications about comments.

I was kinda sad...BUT it has been months since I blogged. I figured you guys would notice me, eventually. (sniff, sniff)

Then I peeked today and saw all the comments!!! YAY!! You all are the best friends - EVER!!

I have so many stories to tell you...

But really - thank you, thank you, thank you! I love you all
(i fixed my email notification, by the way. I've missed a bunch of comments -sorry everyone)

Tales of my death have been widely exaggerated...but I might be slightly more crazy than before

2009-09-19T09:11:00.000-07:00

Wow. It took about five minutes of staring at the date on my last post, to be brave enough to hit "new post". What do I say to y'all??

Thanks for continuing to follow me?
Thanks for being patient?

It has been so long since i have talked to anyone, written anyone one or even had a chance to analyze my own feelings. I kept telling myself I was too busy to blog and that it wouldn't really help anyway. That I wouldn't be able to put my true feelings here, because certain people could read it and it would hurt their feelings, because I'm in a different place now and the same people might not be interested in what I have to say now.

Well....

The hell with that.

This is MY blog. I'll say what ever the hell I like and if you don't like it, please don't read it anymore.

If you are involved in my current life and don't like reading me bitch about how completely F'ed up it is - go away. I am allowed to feel anyway I like and to express that anyway I like. So there. (By the way, my potty mouth is much worse than before , so excuse the swearing - it will get worse, I promise)

So, here is the story in a nutshell...

Hubby lost job, hubby got unemployment - did side jobs for cash - all was well. Old friend called with offers for jobs for both of us. Although I didn't want to go back to full time work, especially in restaurant, we decided it would be a positive move for family. We sold our lovely house (oh, my beautiful kitchen), left all my family (including my 86 YO Gramma) and all of our friends, sold most of our stuff and moved to Utah (in 3 weeks).

Fast forward three months.

I am working 50+ hours a week for someone who treats me like a moron. A stupid moron. For a pitiful amount of money. My poor husband works 10-12 hours a day, six days a week - and gets paid nothing. My beautiful, smart, funny, sensitive boy is in Catholic School kindergarten and acting out like crazy. We live in a rented trailer with no yard and a tiny kitchen and I want to go home SO badly I can barely stand it.

There isn't even anyone I can blame. Hubby tries to blame himself, but we agreed, so that's no fair. I agreed to the temporarily small salary, but I had no idea it was going to be this bad. And "supposedly" hubby is going to be a partner in this business he's doing - but he is the only one putting in the hours he does, away from his family and he is the only one not getting paid. And they don't think he deserves a full partnership...yet.

I have been so fuckin' angry and lost and confused. And sad and stupidly guilty. I'm trying not to add to hubby's stress...but I just want to yell and scream and swear...

Ok, enough whining.

How are you guys?

I have tried to read - here and there. But it's hard to spend ANY of the time I have away from work, doing anything but hangin' with my boy.

I promise to be here more, to write more, to listen more...I'll probably say "fuck" more, but you can forgive that, can't you?

I think feeling so alone has actually made this whole thing much worse. I need you guys - I need my friends...

So, I'm back. Still love me?

Plague of...grasshoppers?

2009-06-29T12:19:00.000-07:00

Where have you guys been??

I miss you all so much!

Oh yeah, I'm the absentee blogger. Figures I can't blame it on everyone else...damn.

Well, here I am in Utah. It's hot, dry and there's some crazy grasshopper infestation. I'm not crazy about taking the credit for that, but it is the worst one in like, 10 years, I think...at least they aren't mutant, zombie grasshoppers!

or are they...?

Anyhow, I've been working like a crazy(er) person. I guess in the whole packing and moving in two weeks mess, I didn't really consider what it was going to mean to go back to work full time. That's a lot of damned hours. And it's much easier in theory than in real life. And there is a lot of crying (AJ too, it isn't ALL me)
I actually worked until 3am on Saturday night. Do you know how long it's been since I've been awake at 3am? A hotbed of excitement, I am not.

Hubby is still back in Oregon, packing up the house (poor thing, he got all the hard work). We are hoping he might be here by Thursday. He and the boy miss each other so much. We call him every night at bedtime and talk on the speaker phone. It's pretty sad. I don't think the boy is very happy about this long-distance family thing.

All-in-all, things seem to be going ok. I'm not super crazy about leaving my boy so much, but working is good, right? The adjustment will be easier when Daddy shows up...

Hows the reception from here? Do I sound different?

Awesome Giveaway! No, not mine...

2009-06-17T08:44:00.000-07:00

I interrupt my regularly scheduled whine about moving, packing and relatives and the hell it is all causing my ~~social~~ bloggy life...to tell you about this...

A completely fabulous Mommy, The Meanest Mom is having a wonderful giveaway featuring one of the greatest products! Now, you all know I get excited over the smallest, shiniest things - -but this isn't even shiny! But it is recycled -and I love me some stuff that is "earff friendly".

Paper Culture sells 100% recycled cards and announcements and they are SO unique. I dare you to not find something you love (did ya follow that thought?).

I would make this all pretty with pictures of their cards and all - BUT go see Jana - all you have to do is leave a comment on her post to enter her giveaway... she has the real goods. And if you haven't been there before (which I find inconceivable!! Anyone else get a Princess Bride flashback, just now?) hang around and go through her drawers and read all her stuff. She is funny as hell!

(and if anyone is stumped as to what to get me for a gift...I'm totally digging those moving announcements with the school of fish!!)

Confessions of the easily distracted...

2009-06-15T20:29:00.000-07:00

Well, Hello everybody!! (waving frantically)

Miss me?

You and me both.

Some of you thought I got lost in Utah. Some of you thought Donny Osmond carried me off (I looked everywhere for him, but he seems stalker proof - -ptthfff) **(Wait, am I the only one around here old enough to have had a huge crush on him, back in the day?)
Anyway, I suppose I owe all of you an explanation about what's going on...

While in Utah (thanks for coming with me, you guys! But I want my fuzzy sox back, Amy and Rambler- you left a bunch of bottles under the seat!! One was still full) my real-life BFF offered me a job. A real job. A full time job. Doing what I used to do before I gave up my job to raise my grandfather (and eventually my son). But that isn't the news. I've turned that job down plenty of times...

Hubby got offered a great job! It has been so hard for him, being unemployed. I know there are so many people in the same position, so many people unable to provide for their families. My husband is a mover, a doer. He hates sitting around. He hates that we have no insurance, that the future is uncertain. That, if he got hurt doing a side job, we could have a serious problem. So this job is a chance to take care of our family...it's a wonderful offer...

BUT:

We have to sell my house, leave my job, my family, my Grandmas...everything. (Yes. It IS all about me)
My beautiful kitchen, my garden, my roses, my fruit trees, my beautiful kitchen...sniff-sniff.

This has all happened so quickly. We got home from Utah last Sunday and signed the final sales agreement for the house yesterday. Not bad for a weeks work. I have had heartburn for days.

We are both exhausted, grumpy and stressed out. My bosses are freaking out, Gramma is freaking out, our future bosses are freaking out (maybe just a tiny bit) and my real estate guy sucks.

Moving back to Utah...yeah...I think I'm losing my mind. (and my mother is coming to visit. Tomorrow... help me...)

I guess my excuse for not writing is that I'm not really sure how I feel about all of this. My hubby is so very excited...he has family there. It's going home for him. It's leaving home for me, and I feel really guilty about leaving the Grammas. I just couldn't think of what to say...

I've missed you guys! We have a POD coming on Friday.

Anybody have any good moving advice?

Breathe...

2009-05-30T15:54:00.000-07:00

Do you hold your breath in tunnels? Or is that just when you drive through cemeteries?
Oh yeah - "honk - honk"!!!

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Winnemucca, Nevada - Woo-Hoo!!

2009-05-30T14:43:00.000-07:00

Lunch and the first flush toilet all day... And don't forget the high class casinos.
I wanted to stay, but everyone else is ready to hit the road. Next stop - Elko.

Bet you can't wait!

(You know I had to do some shopping in the discount liquor store...Rambler drank all the kahlua)
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Hold on tight!

2009-05-30T13:10:00.000-07:00

I don't know if you can really tell from this photo - but that is a loooong way down! And no guard rails - just straight down *gulp*

Hold on to your chips, back there!
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Are we there, yet?

2009-05-30T10:03:00.000-07:00

No.

Not even close...

Have another cookie.
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Lowell Reservoir

2009-05-29T15:47:00.000-07:00

Ok, I had to take it thru the window, so it isn't the best photo...

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On the ROAD

2009-05-29T14:52:00.000-07:00

Finally!!

It took longer than I thought to get everything packed up and in the van...with an extra emergency stop (***TMI alert*** for tampons and chocolate), we are finally on the road!

First leg of the trip is only 3 hours, so we'll have an easy day to get used to each other in the van.

Buckle up, y'all - we're off!
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Are you packed??

2009-05-29T11:06:00.000-07:00

is it every computer I touch that goes bad? I had the whole post typed and 'poof'...

Anyhow, I have 45 minutes of work left -thought I had better check to see if you guys are ready to go. Packed? Snacks? Tunes? Mini liquor bottles? (that might just be me)

Just a few more reports (thanks guys, for waiting until Friday) and I.Am.Outta.Here!!!!

Throw the rest of my crap in the van, cram you guys (plus 2 cameras, video camera and laptop- just MY stuff) into the van - oh, and hubby, boy and dog... whew - we will all be SO close by the time we get there!

Who was in charge of snacks again? I'm hungry.

Oh, and in the TMI department, just got my period. Somebody better have packed chocolate...

Wait, who has the map??

New, improved and super sexy!

2009-05-27T10:22:00.000-07:00

yeah, not me - the new computer.

And it is...it's lovely. Now that it has had everything taken off, cleaned up and put back on - it runs like a dream. My computer guy is not a Vista fan (he hates it) so I have the brand new Windows 7. Never heard of it? Me either, but damn, it's slick.

But now, I don't know what to do. I have to put all my old stuff back on and figure out the new stuff and well, post, I suppose!

I have missed you all so much, I have so many things to tell you - most importantly...

I'm leaving.

Well, leaving here, going to Utah. For a week! It should be fun and I am bringing my brand new, sexy laptop, so I'm hoping I will be posting about everything we're doing...(at least you'll get something from the Blackberry, right?)

Everything is a little crazy right now (like always) trying to throw together a last minute road trip, but I think I will have some wonderful things to share from the road!

I think most of you would LOVE to take a roadtrip with me, right? So, starting Friday, we will be presenting...

On The Road with Sticky

Photos from every stop and video until you can't stand it! The good, the bad and most assuredly, the ugly!!

Whose bringing the snacks??

Happy Memorial Day Weekend

2009-05-24T10:57:00.001-07:00

No, really. I hope your is wonderful! I do.

We had a yard sale. Yeah, that's right, a yard sale on Memorial Day. Yippee.

But, I got a new laptop! Yay, right? "But" you're asking, "I see that this is sent from your Blackberry, again". What's up with that, Sticky?"

As well, you should ask. I bought a computer, got it home. Discovered it was brown. Took it back. (That was the ONLY reason, but the most interesting, so go with it). The next step up (why go back?) Has a 17 inch screen...what to do!

It is lovely. It really is pretty. It is a HP. It has more memory that you can shake a stick at .....and I can't make it work right.

The absolute funniest thing? I can read your blogs and comment - but it will not go to MY blog. Internet Explorer refuses to open my page and won't tell me why.

I give up.

I'm going to go pour concrete squares with my husband. And whine. A lot.

Have a nice weekend. Really.

Sticky

(PS - look out Utah, here we come! Six more days until we leave!)
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I can't make up my mind!

2009-05-21T20:47:00.001-07:00

I did it. I bought a new computer.

I don't think I like it.

And its only because of the color.

Is that as shallow as I think it is?

*Sigh*

Also, I have only used Windows XP.

Is it me or is Vista a pain?

Help!!
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The opposite of regular (but I'm not talking about irregularity, so much)

2009-05-19T08:54:00.000-07:00

Let's just start right out with the poop talk and get it out of the way. I searched for a word that was more the opposite of random - but got no where (no where interesting, anyhow). So I used regular, but then all I could think of were the commercials. You know the ones - they use the words 'regular' and irregularity" in those hushed, reverent tones. As if we haven't changed dispers, as if we don't know there's nothing holy about poop (well, there are some Holy Shit moments, but not quite what they were going for).

Go see Keely -she rocks

I've been jokingly threatening to steal a new computer.
This morning the local news had a story about a bunch of laptops that were stolen form an elementary school. My husband turns to me "One wasn't enough?" he says. Speechless with shock, I could only glare at him. He turned back to his coffee, took a sip and shook his head. "poor kids..."
Not funny.

My husband woke up on Sunday morning with a big smile (stop it). "I had THE best zombie dream! It was just like a movie" Seriously? I know he loves the zombie movies. I get that, I do. But that happy over spending your whole night killing rotting corpses... Should I be concerned?

School is almost over for the summer. I feel guilty because I'm sending Little Dude to summer school. I still have to work, so what else do I do? Besides, the structure helps him so much. I was thinking I would plan activities around the yard and try to get more playdates together - but what else should I do? This is his last summer before 'real school" (like he hasn't been going to school of one kind or another for a few years now) and my Mama guilt is choking me. I can remember summer vacations...I'm depriving him of that. Bad Mom.

Why won't my husband fold the towels the right way? We have been married 10 years, you can't tell me he has never noticed the towels! Who folds their towels in half the short way first? No one, thats who! (I am aware that I just totally skipped over the fact that my husband actually folds towels)
It's making me crazy.In fairness - I will add that he sat and folded laundry for a hour last night while I messed putting furniture on Craigslist. I know, what am I bitching about? It's just that after showing him how for 10 years, why can't he do it???

I have a gorgeous Kitchen Aid mixer for sale and no one wants to buy it.

We are going to have a Thai Food Fiesta for dinner this evening. Anyone want to come over?

I bought Twinkies and HoHo's yesterday. I'm having my Gramma and her sister over for lunch on Thursday. Auntie requested the Twinkies. *sigh*

Last time they came over I made beef veggie soup and fresh bread - -what goes well with Twinkie?

We built two raised beds in my yard for extra garden space this year. They don't get as much full sun as I thought they would. What happens if your tomatoes don't get enough sun? Oh and what do you do with Kale? Anyone?

God, are you tired of all of this yet?

We had a fire out on the patio this weekend. Not like the patio was on fire -but in the firepit. Anyhow, AJ wanted to know what would happen if a spark went "waaay up in the sky" and to the space shuttle and blew it up. My husband, being almost as literal minded as my kid, said "a spark would never be able to leave the atmosphere. Do you know what the atmosphere is?" Keep in mind we are snuggled up in comfy chairs, wrapped in blankets, looking up at the stars, enjoying the fire and the night. It was quiet and peaceful - dare I say even slightly romantic and magical...

My son leans over, out of the warmth of my lap, puts his elbows on the table between my hubby and I, and says "tell me more about this atmersperic thingy, Dada. What is it made out of?" From this point forward, the conversation was no longer about wishes and stars and fireflies. No more songs were sung or stories told...(but we had diagrams!)

Duuuude...

2009-05-18T21:01:00.000-07:00

"I totally rock - do you think I'm handsome?"

If I were to be able to ~~beg, borrow or steal~~ buy a new laptop, does anyone have a suggestion as to what kind? Brand?

I need some advice>

I probably won't buy a Mac..but other than that - ideas?

Ideas, anyone??

2009-05-18T15:49:00.000-07:00

My son took this photo. I don't have any idea what it could be. Any guesses?

'surviving' the weekend - the rest of the story

2009-05-18T10:34:00.000-07:00

Did you see how I did that? Survivor - surviving...smart, huh? I know, its crazy how my mind is like a ~~sieve~~ steel trap. A very clever steel trap...

I'm watching Survivor right now and the end just makes me cringe - as always. So many whiny people. Damn. It's a game and it gets so ugly...so unnecessary. I can't even watch anymore..la la la, I can't hear you!

Why is this stuff so interesting? Why can't I stop watching? Our family loves to watch Survivor. We love the challenges, we love cheering for people - we just love to watch (AJ cried when Coach got voted off, strange child).

But the end..The end sucks SO bad. Everyone plays the game until the end then everyone is mad. It strangely makes me very uncomfortable when they are all mad at whoever is winning. Like it's their fault you suck.

But then again, I can't look away...it's that Jeff Probst. I just love him. He did a blog this year and he cracks me up.

So happy JT won -what a cutie...

UPDATE** Giant surprise that my computer died before I was finished writing this - and it went ahead and posted incomplete. I have just had it. I'm not even going to try to post from that thing anymore. I surrender... Anyhow - there was SO much more to go with this post and as I was just about to open myself up for a little public humiliation, in the name of learning from my experience - I figured I had better repost - ENJOY!

I'm probably going to get a lot of crap for this - but lesson learned, so you might as well hear it, right? Maybe one of you can avoid the excrutiating lesson I had to learn...

We spent the day working on the playhouse in the backyard...building hammering, drilling, lifting, carrying - you know ALL my favorite things. We are building it under our giant apple tree, so all day little twigs and moss and miscellaneous bug parts were falling on me. It was reeeaally fun It stays light so much later (all of a sudden) and so we ate dinner pretty late. Suddenly I realized that it was almost 8, no one had showered and the Survivor Finale was ready to start!

Panic!! (yes, I have a DVR - but it is a 3 hour show and I wanted to watch it last night, not today!)

I decided, in my desperation to ~~watch my stupid reality show~~ get my beloved child to bed on time, that if Little Man and I showered together we would save that much time (and water - I'm a conservationist, yo!)

Let me just say right now, up front - I do NOT normally shower or bathe with my five year old son. Don't yell at me. I used to. I did. He loves having company in the bath. He still asks me all the time. I'm very popular for bathtime games and stories -really.

It's actually more embarrassing I stopped doing it, not because we were getting dangerously close to that line (where ever that is -I'm never really sure)
but because showering with your child is damned hard on your self esteem!

"I love your big butt, Mama" is one of the least heartbreaking things he said to me. As soon as I got him in the shower, I knew I had made a huge mistake, but we were already committed and in I went. I won't go into all the horror and the songs he sang, (continuously) the best of which was about catching water drops off of giant boobies... the questions about growing up and being as big as me...the pointing, the laughing, the raspberries... (asking me to block ~~the sun~~ the water with my large body...

If he isn't scared for life - I certainly am.

The moral of the story is...
(I'm sitting here, sifting thru my brain, attempting to pick out the one most important thing I learned...it's tough)

Truthfully? My advice is remember to stop ~~slaving~~ helping hubby with his projects much earlier. Have a cold beer, a hot (leisurely) shower (alone, where no one mocks my any of my body parts) and watch my show while hubby bathes the kid!

That was a difficult lesson to learn and I just think if I can spare one person from repeating my horrifying experience...it will be worth it (not really).

Crash test dummy

2009-05-14T21:43:00.001-07:00

I was trying to add to my post, because my wonderful friend Amy at Everything is fine as long as the coffee is good; found a link to a really cool zombie poster that I my husband totally needs...

But

Yeah, you guessed it. Crash.

Are you all completely sick of hearing about my computer 'issues'? Sorry, I know I've been whiney...I'll be better. I promise!

If you want to see the poster she found - check out:

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=24660249

Sticky
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Bitter Betty

2009-05-13T21:56:00.000-07:00

No, not biter, bitter.

I got this wonderful award from Tamis at A Day in the Life and her wonderful kids. They are so sweet and I think AJ and Trevor may be taking over the world together, someday!

It's a cute award and I really enjoyed reading her information and writing mine. Well, I enjoyed it the first time I wrote it.

Not so much the second or the third time. I'm just having the worst time with this computer. If it isn't shutting down on its own and deleting all my precious words, then its tricking me into accidentally deleting it all myself (and then shutting down) .

So Tamis, I am so sorry that I haven't done this award completely - but I've lost a little of my motivation after 4 try's. Thank you so much for giving it to me and I promise - as soon as I can trust this computer not to delete me again - I will get it up!! (*snort* I said' get it up...')

The other item I need to take care of is a request for an award. The fabulous CC at If I only Had Superpowers has requested the coveted Zombie Chicken award. I would just love to pass it on...so, here ya go, sweetie -

Technically you are supposed to pass it on to five others, or face the wrath of the zombie chicken....good luck.

What are all you guys doing this weekend? Will it be raining where you are? Do you have big plans or just hanging out with family? I think it's supposed to be nice here, which is great. We were given a big wooden play structure and we are going to make a super cool fort and tree house for AJ. Yay!

And sometime this weekend I'm going to erase my hard drive and re-install my operating system. Wish me luck!

Fickle

2009-05-12T22:50:00.001-07:00

I think I've lost my American Idol mojo. Not that I didn't watch it - I just didn't care.

Do you still care? Rambler? You there?

Now, I'm still all over Survivor. I'm very excited to see if they kick crazy Coach out.

Is that as sad as it sounds? That's what I have to talk about? Reality shows? Really interesting...

I'm doing more relative inspired, crap work this weekend and someone elses crazy (fake) reality is so much more interesting than mine. (And theirs doesn't make me feel homicidal)

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Space. It's not just in the sky anymore

2009-05-12T22:19:00.000-07:00

I'm in the middle of writing a (decent) post, but the computer keeps shutting down. Damn it.

Anyhow...I found this super cool widget - look down at the bottom of the page. Really. Go ahead. There's no trick.

Just move your mouse around in the blank spot and click to change colors.

Cool, huh? (

Just thought I would share...more soon. I hope.

Conversations...

2009-05-11T15:44:00.000-07:00

"Mama,you like me, right?"

"Of course I do, baby."

"Really, really like me?"

"Yes. Yes, I do"

"Good. Then when I grow up, will you marry me?"

Strangely, we have had this conversation before. I don't get it, but I tried to explain again...and that when he grew up he would probably want a girl his own age, blah, blah, blah.

So he asked did I mean like the girls in his class and I said 'sure, why not.'

"Do you think they will let me marry one on one day and a different one the next day?"

Sure babe, why not...

It was Mother's Day?

2009-05-10T22:14:00.001-07:00

Kidding. I'm kidding.

It was a working weekend for us, we drove over to the beach and helped my aunt and uncle move boxes. They just moved here from the east coast and their movers refused to deliver to their new house (long story - steep road - crappy driver).

Anyhow, we borrowed a truck, packed up some camping stuff and off we went. Its a brand new house, just gorgeous - but unfinished and lots of boxes. It was nice to be able to help them out.

AJ even cooperated and was so good - it was like a gift all in itself. We only spent about half an hour on the actual beach (today) and of course by the time we got there to sun was gone...oh well. We were there to work, right!?

I wanted to post, but cell service is AWFUL there! So computer at home, no service away...just shoot me! I didn't seem to care while the beer was flowing - but I was lonely without you all. No one else understands my obsession...

Goodnight all - I'll be at work in the morning and I can read all about you then...I can't wait, I'm sure you all got flowers and diamonds!

At least homemade cards and breakfast in bed, right?

Sticky
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Lost on the internets

2009-05-07T23:46:00.000-07:00

To whom it may concern;

I don't know what's going on, I don't know what's happening around here, I'm lost, I'm confused, I'm lonely.

My computer is broken and I can't get online very often. It shut down 4 times tonite, in like 5 minutes...

I can read blogs on my Blackberry, but I find it very complicated to try and leave comments- mostly it doesn't work...

My husband is doing handyman jobs, which he's very good at, so he isn't as stressed. I'm relaxed on the outside, but still pretty freaked out on the inside about the whole 'no job' thing.

I feel cut off from my online friends. I'm missing what's going on and I'm missing you guys.

I'll be helping my aunt and uncle moving all weekend, so I won't be home to blog and cell phone service is spotty where they are...I think I might have a panic attack.

Everytime I get on hubby to do something now, he says "what are you gonna do, pee on me?"

And - according to me comments (squeeeee!!!) The Bloggess' husband has had the same issues! (How DO you get the smell out?)

If you were cut off from the internet, how long before you would lose your mind? What's your solution? Gimme some bloggy advice!! I'm a little twitchy...

Sticky
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Dear Abby, Heloise, Miss Manners et al

2009-05-06T17:41:00.000-07:00

I have noticed there seem to be quite a few advice blogs going up lately (and by quite a few, I mean three in the last few weeks). What do you suppose that means?

Are there lots of people looking for advice? Needing advice, even desperate for advice?

or

Maybe there are lots of people with really good advice, just waiting for someone to ask?

I don't know.

Maybe there are just a lot of people (perhaps just me) flailing around the universe, waiting for someone to point them in the right direction. I'm always afraid to ask for advice. Afraid to put someone on the spot. You know, what if they don't have any advice? Wouldn't it be rude to just demand input about your problem? "Hey you! Tell me what to do!"

I guess in most cases, comments are advice. If you write about a problem, all your bloggy friends offer solutions. That's nice and friendly, don't you think? You throw something out there and people respond. But, I guess that puts you on the spot, right? I mean they know who you are. People can come back to your blog to see if you took their advice and hold you accountable if you don't.

"Dude, I told you to go with the blue eyeliner. The 80's are totally back...WHY didn't you listen to me...?"

or

"I told you the only way to kill the zombie was to cut off the head and now you are totally infected and I TOLD you so!" (Sorry, I have a fixation lately)

That's a ton of pressure. I suppose going to an outside source for advice would be more anonymous. I love that new Ask the Bloggess column. And I love her advice, "try peeing on the dog" is my new advice for just about everything. How could that possibly fail you. Although I suppose the advice that makes you pee your pants laughing isn't always the kind you need... (which really is too bad and makes peeing on the couch easier when you can't control your own bladder - the dog is harder to catch...)

I think it will be interesting to see the different options, the different types of advice offered. I may just have to jump from site to site and see if I can get all my issues resolved.

Cheaper than therapy, right?

Oh, I finally got my husband to start doing things without me. Things are much calmer around here now, Thanks.

(Hey - anyone know how to get pee smell out of a Lazyboy?) :)

Gotcha!!

2009-05-05T20:47:00.000-07:00

I (finally) got the coveted (by me) Chicken Zombie Award!!

Thank You Cher, for giving me (and shutting up my whining) this wonderful award! You totally made my day! I hope I live up to the spirit of this award...

About the Award: "The blogger who receives this award believes in the Tao of the zombie chicken - excellence, grace and persistence in all situations, even in the midst of a zombie apocalypse( I TOLD you). These amazing bloggers regularly produce content so remarkable that their readers would brave a raving pack of zombie chickens just to be able to read their inspiring words. As a recipient of this world-renowned award, you now have the task of passing it on to at least 5 other worthy bloggers. Do not risk the wrath of the zombie chickens by choosing unwisely or not choosing at all…"

Now, normally I like to disregard blog award rules. However, I am not about to risk the wrath of the Zombie Chicken. To that end, I am nominating Five amazing bloggers who will be thrilled (I'm so sure) to receive this prestigious award!

1. Keely - only because I know she will be horrified (and probably pissed at me) as she HATES Zombies, but she would be THE girl to have at your back during a chicken zombie apocalypse.

2. Candice - She rocks, mightily. I would put money on her over a zombie ANYDAY!

3. Diane - this is right up your alley, Chicky! (Besides she offered to "destroy" me when I thought I had the zombie flu)

4. Amy - Because she's my newest bloggy BBF and I luuuuv her! She would be a good zombie hunter.

And 5. FON - because I so want her to adopt me into her family...she's so cool...

Thumb wars

2009-05-04T23:36:00.000-07:00

Writing the occasional post from my blackberry was cool. Having to write every post with my thumbs is getting me down.

The entire experience is different. Its harder to think and much harder to edit. It just really isn't the same experience...

I'm sure I must have mentioned the meeting at AJ's "new" school? The pre-kindergarten meeting where we (his future teacher, principal, counselor, case worker, district psychologist and me) were going to figure out the best way to handle AJ's "kindergarten experience"? Come up with a plan to make sure he can succeed...?

Yeah, THAT meeting.

Guess what? Turns out you aren't allowed in an elementary school during a "swine flu outbreak" when you are coughing up a lung and clutching a handful of used kleenex! And apparently canceling or postponing said meeting with its 6-8 attendees is impossible.

So...

I had to send hubby.

Yeah. That was my thought too. (And his)

I gave him a huge pep talk, a pen and a pad of paper with strict instructions to not sign anything and call if he needed to (why couldn't we just have the meeting on twitter? #ajspeeps?)

And off he went - (my brave boy)

That was one loooong hour!

And when he got home? Was he full of all the ideas tossed around? School lingo? Plans and outlines for teaching the next great dinosaur astronaut...?

Nope.

But I hear everyone is crazy impressed with how smart the boy is (that's when hubby stopped listening and signed all the papers).

(I'm having another meeting next week, I hope)

Oh yeah - for all of you who were worried - it turns out I didn't have the zombie virus OR even the swine flu. Nope, not a single brain was eaten (although, I did think mine were coming out of my ears at one point).

It is a bit of a personal letdown for me.
Now I have no use for all my zombie apocalypse parafenalia, paraphenelia er... crap! (Why doesn't blackberry know how to spell that?)

Evidently, you can't catch the zombie virus over the internets. In fact, it turns out that the only zombie thing you CAN get online is that chicken zombie award. BUT, since no one gave me one (sniff) I don't even have that... Sigh...

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PS - my hubby totally laughed at me while I was typing this (with my poor thumbs).

Through the pain and cramping, I snarled - "I'm writing about you being such a dumbass!"

and he laughed - "it's your thumbs"

I hate when he's right.

Eight reasons to read this...

2009-05-02T20:23:00.000-07:00

I got tagged (like a giant killer whale) for a meme a couple weeks ago. Lana at The Kids did What?! caught me with this one...so enjoy -

8 Things I am looking forward to...

* Summer. I am sick to death of being cold and wet. Mostly wet.
* Hubby getting a job - any job. Ok, not any job...something that won't make him crazy.
* New juicer getting here. We finally spent a Christmas gift certificate. I love juice.
* Being able to breathe again, or at least relieving some of the pressure in my head.
* Having a computer that actually works (big dream, no help in sight)
* Summer BBQ's and camping (not likely this summer, but still)
* Going to the beach.

8 Things I did yesterday...

* Showered (Not. I was sick, alright?!)
* watched really bad tv.
* Laid on the couch.
* Blew my nose and coughed up a lung (or two)
* Cursed my husband and my son (under my breath) for being healthy and loud and not making me feel any better
* Considered drilling a hole in my head
* Considered drilling a hole in my husbands head
* Realized there is no longer a life insurance policy on husband, since layoff. Damn.

8 Things I wish I could do...

* Win the lottery (no doubt!)
* lose 30 pounds
* sleep past 7am, sometime, anytime...please????
* Let go. Just let go of all the shit in my brain...
* Cook all the food I would like to without ever worrying about the cost of ingredients.
* Have all of my family over for dinner
* Take better pictures.
* Take my family on vacation. (just a little one, we aren't picky)

8 Shows I watch...

* House
* American Idol
* Survivor
* Burn Notice
* Saving Grace
* Word World
* Daily Show
* Today Show

If this looks interesting, please tag yourself - I hate to pressure to anyone.

Flash me Friday...Huh? Oh. Sorry, FlashBACK Friday

2009-05-01T10:28:00.000-07:00

not too tighty...not too whitey??? (posted 08/26/08)

Close your eyes and picture this -

4 year old boy, white briefs pulled so far up his butt, it looks like a thong...
running back and forth through the living room, holding the aforementioned butt...
yelling...
"help, help - something's stuck in my bum"

See, this is what happens when you laugh. My mom always warned me that laughing at the crazy things he does will only encourage him. Can I say how much I HATE when she's right?

If you laugh once, he will repeat whatever it was over and over and over...

One little wedgie...God help me.

By node id tuffy

2009-04-30T20:55:00.001-07:00

And I fink I'm tick...

And I got my period too (sorry). What did I do that karma is kicking me so hard?

And laptop is still down...

Hubby did make me chocolate pudding tho - so I might live.

Think I should wear one of those mask things to the school tomorrow?!
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The Zombie Apocalypse Rears it's ugly head

2009-04-29T21:27:00.000-07:00

This is what happens when you poke the beehive too often.

You know how we are, if we're scared of something we mock it viciously or poke at it with a sharp stick. Makes us feel like we have control. The tiger by the tail - sorta.

We have been calling that awful Swine Flu, the"T Virus" (think Resident Evil movie) for days! Hubby has an unhealthy fascination with zombie movies and it keeps us laughing when I could be killing him. Still could, the jury is out. Anyhow, we're up here in Oregon, relatively safe and evidently feeling pretty cocky about it. So, of course, guess who is sick?

Yup. That would be me. I have heard so many jokes all day about moving me down to the basement...feeding me chunks of raw meat...blowing my nose off, accidentally...coughing up a lung...wondering if zombies can still do laundry (not a chance of me doing it now! Zombie or not.)

No, I'm sure it isn't the actual Swine Flu (or the zombie stuff) but I am really quite miserable.
Its probably Karma punishing me for making jokes but it sucks. Why couldn't hubby have gotten sick instead? That would have been much funnier. Waaaay funnier.

Oh. And I mean it really would have taught me a lesson, Karma. Really.
Sorry.

I had another post I was writing. But my laptop kept shutting down. I had just rewritten it for the 3rd time and it died again, so I gave up.

Hubby loses his job and my laptop dies. Nothing good coming out of that sentence. At least I can still post from my Blackberry (until my thumbs wear out). You will have to forgive all the errors. Much harder to fix and edit...

So, unless I really do have the zombie flu, I'll try to post again tomorrow. Being sick means no old lady jobs, don't want to pass that crap around, don't ya know...

By the way, I have lived in this house for going on five years.
I am almost sure I never really thought about the fact that I live on 69th Street! (She said 69)
I'm kinda embarrassed for myself.

I think I need more cold medicine...(Or maybe some brains)

Hey, I only have allergies!
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I what ? I mean...duh....I thought - Oh crap, nevermind...

2009-04-28T20:13:00.000-07:00

I have a song stuck in my head. I was looking for it on You Tube, so I could share the pain with you - and I found this song, instead...

(deleted - You Tube messes with my blog too much)

I love when they say "let's do it like they do it on the Discovery Channel"
Cracks me up every time! That really shows how juvenile I am, huh?

I'm watching American Idol. Jamie Fox? Really? Hmm. I thought that Chris guy, the one that sang first, rocked!

To show you how childish I truly am - here is the Alvin and the Chipmunks version of the song that was stuck in my head the first time.

(deleted - damn you Alvin)

(can I confess, I almost peed my pants when I heard this?)
"We don't need no water, let the mother fucker burn..."

My dog is staring at me. I can't tell if she can't take her eyes off me because she loves me so much, or she's wondering what I'll taste like when she eats me. Its really a toss up, I think.

I finally got my Hubby out of the house today. My boss called and had him do some work he needed done on his house. I cannot even tell you how wonderful it was to come home and have the peace and quiet you can only get with one a five year old and a hyper dog...heaven!

I made an awesome dinner tonight - Spinach Risotto with Shrimp and Goat Cheese. Good Lord, it was so good. I do love goat cheese... (with leftover fresh bread I baked yesterday)

I have a craving - so tomorrow is Greek day in the kitchen. I think some fresh baked pita bread, marinated kabobs, lemon rice and some tzatziki( cucumber sauce)...recipes anyone?

American Idol update. I had lost some of my enthusiasm for Danny, but he sang one of my favorite songs - Come Rain or Come Shine. I have always loved that song.

Keely has me thinking about the Zombie Apocalypse. We watch a lot of zombie movies over here...and when the CDC started talking about swine flu, we started thinking...

I almost got my garden completely planted this weekend. Yes. I do know its only because my hubby is such a pushy bastard. Yes. I whined and complained almost the entire time. Even hid on occasion.
I suck.

I know I'm late, but thanks for letting me play.
At least I'm within a day!

Have to put the kid to bed (late as usual) I can't get anyone else in my lap and still even attempt to type...later dudes!

Basa Body - oh my goodness!

2009-04-27T21:45:00.000-07:00

First, I have to apologize, I've been trying to get this post out for days! I have barricaded myself in my bedroom, hopefully I won't be disturbed...

I'm assuming you have all heard me talk about the Mom it Forward event in Portland I went to - the actual purpose of the event was to raise money for Yehu Moms in Kenya. There are three charities and one is Basa Body. All three charities have to do with producing and selling coconut oil and products made with the oil.

When I heard that Jyl at Mom it Forward was offering samples of Basa Body products to mom's interested in doing a review, I got my name in as fast as I could. When I found out I was getting to do it, I was thrilled! I spend a lot of time outside in the summer, camping, working in the yard, mostly barefoot. I am always looking for good skin products.

When my little box showed up, I found myself wanting to eat it, not wash with it! That soap smells SO good, you won't even believe it. Mint Chocolate Truffle Soap....mmm-mmm-mmm!
I had to keep it away from my boy and Hubby said he couldn't wait for me to wash with it! (naughty, naughty).

I have to admit, I am not crazy about coconut. The smell, the taste - just not my thing. However, this stuff has such a mild smell and really does smell good. There was also a Basa Body Stick with natural coconut oil healing balm. I tried it first. It is wonderful! The coconut melts into your skin "like butta". It isn't greasy or heavy, it makes you skin soft and it smells very light. I love it I keep it next to my side of the bed...I need more, much more!

It took me longer to try the soap. I was enjoying the smell, in general, and I was a little nervous about smelling like Mint Chocolate Truffle! It has a wonderful lather and it felt really good on my skin. The bubbles were a really dark brown, which I didn't like as much, but still it was great. My skin felt very soft and clean without feeling dry or oily. I thought the fragrance was good, not over powering or too sweet.

I asked hubby what I smelled like after my shower and he said I smelled "light and flowery" but couldn't tell exactly what it was. That's good, I think. I want to smell good, but not overwhelmingly - something, you know?

So, I went online and bought some of their body lotion (tried it in Portland, loved it!) and more body sticks! I figured I had better buy more now before everyone finds out how great it is and the price goes up.

If you are at all interested in trying the product or donating to the charity, please do. Check out Mom it Forward or Basa Body for information. I have a Chip In over on the left side if you would like to donate (it had nothing to do with me -just goes to the charity).

Oh! They are running a great gift Package for Mother's Day! It's called the Kiss Me Gift Pack and it usually sells for $34.99 and it's on sale for $29.99. AND if you buy it and enter the code "momitforward" on checkout, you are automatically entered to win a $250 Disney gift card. What more could you want?

Everyone needs gifts for mom, right? Buy a gift for Mom, help another mom. It's win-win!

Crap, here comes hubby...it's week two of "Home with Hubby" and I'm ready to go over the wall.

Send help,

PS - They also sell coconut oil for cooking...I'm saving up for some of that! As a cook, I'm dying to try it - healthy, long shelf life...check out the site, looks fabulous - Coast Coconut Farms.
Sorry, all this stuff just looks so great!

Shhh...pretend like we're not talking...somebody HELP me!!!

2009-04-24T20:27:00.000-07:00

Something HAS to be done!

I am cowering in the spare room, writing this on my phone because every time I pick up my laptop he says "oh. Are you going to do that NOW? I thought we would...". And then he comes up with something new. For us to do. Together.

Seriously. Together. Every. Thing.

God.

I love the man, really I do. But he waits for me to get home from work so we can have lunch together and then wants to know "what's next?". Last night when I was supposed to be blogging and watching Survivor, I was baking a cake. Baking a cake...

I just got comfy on the couch with my laptop and the remote, finally ready to do MY thing for a change...and this voice...

"Let's bake something. A cake."
I know what you're thinking. Most of the time, in my world, if someone says "we" or "let's" it means me. Not anymore. So, there I was, 8:30 last night, baking a German Chocolate Cake with my husband. Together, from scratch...sigh...

(Like I need more damned chocolate in this house)

And then - and then...he wanted...

He wanted...he expected to go to bed together and have sex. Together. Without blogging!!

I KNOW!! Quelle horreur!! See! I'm distraught. I'm speaking in tongues...sob...

And then today, we spent the whole damned day together. Rototilling the freaking garden, cooking dinner, doing dishes - together.

I tried to talk to him, I tried reason...I mean he shouldn't be so selfish, what about the children, think of him! What must he be thinking?

What would Oprah say?

Oh God, I can hear him coming...act casual...

(send help...I miss you guys)

He's got to find a job!
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"Earff" Day (and some other drunken random stuff)

2009-04-22T08:31:00.000-07:00

Happy Earth Day Everyone!

In the midst of my love-and-thank-you-fest, in regards to my Mom it Forward Tweet Up experience, I have been reminded that today is Earth Day. My boy, who generally pays no attention to anything not envolving him, is (for some reason) all over Earth Day. I have no idea what we should do today, specifically - we try to be"Earff friendly" all the time.

What do we do(everyday)to keep green?

I am so glad you asked!

We do live in Eugene, Oregon, and recyling here is HUGE! S0, we recycle all our paper, plastic and glass - everyday. We compost, but anything that doesn't go in our bin, goes to the Forest Product company organic recycle pile. We make our own juice and jam and pickles, we have apple and pear trees. Anything we don't use is donated. We grow lots of veggies...We shop with our own grocery bags. We turn off the water while we brush our teeth. I make my own earth friendly cleaning products. You would be amazed at what you can do with vinegar and baking soda! And I think I just hurt my self...do I really do all that stuff? ( I think I make my family do most of it). Oh! and I didn't pull weeds for Earth Day! Yay! (whose idea was that?)

And this video is awesome!

UPDATE:
I forgot to post this earlier today and then I went out and had drinks, I mean dinner.

This is the part where I babble because I had $15.00 worth of alcohol (can you believe how much they charge for a martini?) And did you know, contrary to what you might think - gin and chocolate cake taste pretty good together.

So, anyone out there have a retired or unemployed husband? Mine just got laid off on Friday. I know, I know everyone around here is out of work, it's crazy. I'm not panicking. Well, what good would it do? Takes energy I don't have, I'm too busy spending all my time trying not to kill him!

How am I supposed to put up with him home all the time? He's taken over all my free time and he tells me what to do. (I know! It's stuff I told him needed to get done - but still!)

Here's here driving me crazy all the time. Except tonight. I am...a little tipsy. But I came home early, so he left to play pool. Should that bother me? I'm not really sure. But I think I could use a nap...or another drink.

Is American Idol on tonight? I didn't really enjoy last night. I do enjoy disco on the odd occasion, but lasy night just didn't do anything for me. Even Adam was dull. Do you like the new judge Kara? She bothers me.

Are they lip-synching that opening disco-hell number? Ack!

I poured concrete all afternoon. We are making patio squares. It only makes slightly more sense when you see it as when you hear it. Patio squares, hmmmm.

My son's invisible friend (Wilma) just told me that they are not ready to stop playing Jumpstart right now. They are washing their new puppy. When did we get a new puppy?

I'm breaking up with Facebook. I think. Well, I really want to, but I keep chickening out.

We are talking about holding AJ back from kindergarten next year. I don't know what we should do and I don't know if we are over-reacting. it is so hard to decide what is just a five year old being five and whats is something he needs help with. He did so great meeting all those new kids this weekend, I was so proud of him.

He is getting so big, he looks like a boy who should be in school.

I want some of that chocolate from my GiftTree basket...yummm

I wonder if there's gin in the liquor cabinet. I'm gonna be so sorry tomorrow.

The one where Sticky gets gifts...

2009-04-21T20:15:00.000-07:00

I know! Who would have guessed?

Last night, I promised to tell you about the Mom it Forward Tweet Up in Portland. It was really small, unlike others(Hello New York, holy Crap!!) but man, we had a good time! We held it in a little coffee shop in the Hawthorne district. It was called Fat Straw and they had the cutest little back room; couches, wifi, the whole nine yards. The ladies there were super nice (they didn't even complain when we stood in front of their door for an extra two hours after they kicked us out) and we got to order dinner from the bar next door. They are famous for their 'bubble teas'...but for me, I no likey the tapioca. Ick.

I met our lovely Carissa there and she brought some awesome giveaways. CC was there - she had kindly agreed to be my date (why I thought I needed one, I can't really say - and regardless of any rumors I may have started, she never put out. At all. Sigh.). And the lovely Michelle of @dappersnapper fame was there as well. Go check her out. Everyone who has a young child (with the ever baggy drawers) needs her product and she is just as pretty as her picture. Plus, she's a total riot! The stories she told... And I told NO (zero, zip) embarrassing stories (about myself) and anyone that says I did is making stuff up...(it was the tapioca balls, I swear!!)

Anyhow, we met, we talked, we laughed...it was a really wonderful night. Then came the giveaways (yeah, that part was fun too!)

I won a huge box from GiftTree.com!!!!

Ok, I knew nothing about GiftTree, nothing. But Carissa said they saw her tweets about the event and offered to give us something for our raffle. Cool, huh? It was a pretty big box, but I have received a "gift box" before and there usually isn't much in it.

Not this box.

The funny thing is that t was shipped to my house, to make sure it got there in time and I didn't really look at it. If only I had known...We didn't really open it at the party. It was wrapped so well and we didn't want to mess it up. But what we did notice was it was packed with it's own pair of scissors (very handy) and an engraved tag -

From April

Is that just the coolest thing ever? Way to go GiftTree, that was seriously over the top, awesome service!!

I did manage to wait until I got back to the hotel to open the box (didn't want to embarrass Carissa by swigging that wine in the car). Oh My God! There was SO much in this box, you wouldn't believe it! Here are some photos - they do not even do it justice, but you have to check this out!

Amazing huh? (yes, that was brie, smoked salmon and caviar in there amidst all the chocolate and wine!)

Can I just say, if you are looking for a gift, you absolutely cannot go wrong with GiftTree.com.

Thanks so much guys (yep, my diet is out the window, at least until the chocolate is gone!)

PS - Happy Earth Day!!

As AJ reminds me - "reduce, reuse, recycle, Mama - save the Earff, don't be a littlebug!!" (or litterbug, whatever)

Great job teaching them young! Thanks NickJr!

It's already Monday?

2009-04-20T17:56:00.000-07:00

I'm so behind!

I was going to do an update on my wonderful weekend and I didn't.

I was going to have all my photos downloaded for today. Not.

Pictures from dinner? Uh...nope.

Dog a bath?

From April

Kid a bath?

From April

Well, I did manage to open a bottle of wine, so grab a seat and let me tell you all about it...

This weekend was great! On Friday, after days of cleaning my house(ok, not really) Carissa (GoodNCrazy) came by for a visit. She brought her kids, so hers and mine played and my little boy was so thrilled to have new friends (especially older women!).

Now, don't get me wrong, I don't have a big self-esteem problem. I figure I'm alright. Maybe a little rusty with face-to-face socializing, but I'm a good person, fairly entertaining.

But this was Carissa! The Carissa. Don't even tell me you don't know her. If you don't read her blog, you know her from Twitter, she probably taught you how to use it(that's how I learned). Or you know her from GNO or Mom it Forward or maybe you bought one of her great bags. I swear the woman knows everyone! And not in a "I know more people than you, neener, neener, neener!" way, either. She is the kind of person that people just really want to talk to. I loved it! I loved her! She has so many great ideas and knowledge and she was really fun to hang out with. (It's true, Sweetie, I had the best time, love you!).

Anyhow, lasagna was had by all and it was good.

On Saturday we got up, packed and made our way to Portland. I found this cool little hotel online and I could not wait to find out if it was as nice as I hoped. They were very doggie friendly. In fact they delivered a doggie bed, bowls with a doggie mat, a squeaker ball, treat and a poop bag. Very friendly folks.

The hotel itself is really new and very European in design. The lobby was lovely with lots of couches and tv's and apple computers to use (nice pool table for hubby too). Beautiful bar area and 24 hour self serve cafe. They have a fitness center (no, I didn't use it!) and a pool. Comfy lounge chairs everywhere and real pool towels. Also a really nice "backyard" with plenty of room to hang out.

They have free bicycles (cruisers?) to be used while you stay there Even a "bicycle built for two" if you are so inclined. Here are some photos - you should check this place out if you are ever in Portland. It is close to the airport, so you do hear some plane action, but it doesn't detract from the over-all cool ambiance and the staff was exceptionally friendly and helpful and free parking too! (no kickbacks for the review, we just really liked it).

Once we got checked in and messed the place up enough to be comfy, it was time to meet my next bloggy buddy.

My Superhero BFF CC (you did say I could be your sidekick and I'm totally holding you to it!) came to be my date for the party and brought her beautiful kids over to splash in the pool with my little monster. They were all so cute. That little girl is charming. They all seemed to have a great time and she was tons of fun. I was to nervous to get in the pool, but no one seemed to mind.

Mom it Forward Portland was next and I'll tell you all about it tomorrow. It was great.

I have to admit that I was a little nervous about meeting these fabulous women, but they couldn't have been nicer or more friendly. I had a wonderful time - what a great birthday.

Thanks for all the birthday wishes you sent my way - they worked! Love you all.

Why, yes! It IS my birthday!

2009-04-16T21:34:00.000-07:00

Thanks for noticing.

I thought, in honor of the occasion, I would share with you...

Sticky: the early years

Different face - same fabulous attitude!

T he family and I are headed to Portland tomorrow, for fun and an exciting fundraiser with the Mom it Forward Moms,

I'm planning on taking a zillion photos as I meet with these bloggy moms for the first time, so I promise to post photos of all, myself and fab hair-do too!!

Have a great weekend all!

I feel pretty

2009-04-15T22:30:00.001-07:00

I did something today. Something I haven't done in a long time.

I got my hair "did" in a salon. A real salon. Where they wash and massage you, cut and color and dry and style...heaven.

I don't know what happened. I used to go all the time. Without fail. I never even considered doing my own hair (and looking at what I have managed to do to my poor hair, I know why).

I did that thing we aren't supposed to do (well, ever - but especially after having a child). I stopped taking care of myself. I quit getting waxed and buffed, I quit working out and getting colored and I quit buying myself pretty clothes...the horror.

Now, I am not saying that I haven't done anything at all for myself, I did just get a brand new kitchen. And a new mixer and a juicer. But the feeling coming out of that salon was like nothing else.

I'm not giving that up again.

I mean really. Where would that money really go anyway?

The lady at the salon asked me what my husband preferred; long or short hair. Just as casual conversation, not looking for permission or anything...I told her that when we met, he liked long hair. A lot. Did NOT want me to cut it. Now, he likes whatever makes me happy. He says the smile on my face when I feel 'pretty' is a million times better than long hair. There's no better encouragement than that.

I've got a good one -

And I feel pretty -

Bet you wish you were going to see me in Portland Saturday night for the Mom it Forward fundraiser! Its my first bloggy event, I'm so excited to meet people!
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Snow? WTH?

2009-04-14T07:03:00.000-07:00

This just doesn't seem right, somehow.
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What was I talking about?

2009-04-13T12:27:00.000-07:00

Here it is, Monday again...

Everything went fine this morning, got the boys off (school and work) minimal fuss. Got myself to work, poured some coffee and started right in with my first and most important job of the day - snuggling up to Google Reader and reading about what all of you have been doing since yesterday...

I was already working on my next post (you know - in my head) all about the crazy stuff I have to do to get ready for this weekend - the complany, the fundraiser, my birthday...

But then...

The universe snuck up on me and bashed me on the head to remind me just how small and petty my problems are.

Damn you, universe... I hate you.

Another Bloggy Mama lost a precious baby yesterday. Thalon Bruce Meyers was not even 4 months old... I can't even bear to think about what his family must be going through right now.

I don't know the Meyers'. I didn't know the Spohrs', either.

As a parent, as a human being - I can think of nothing worse, nothing than losing your child.

It's breaking my heart.

Why am I writing about this?

We are all, all of us out here. Bound together through our keyboards, our wifi and our phone lines...laughing, sharing, complaining...crying - connecting. We hang out together everyday, sharing bits and pieces of our lives, making connections, making friends - communicating. I was never so proud to be a blogger than I was this last week - watching Maddie Spohr's MS donation page jump to over $30,000 in 3 days. The love that is out here is amazing - pure and selfless.

It is easy to be brought closer together through laughter; humor and sarcasm are our armor afterall...BUT it's times like this that sorrow, heartbreak, compassion and even anger - bind us tighter and make us, all of us stronger and better.

Hold your family, your loved ones a little closer today...
and send a prayer and love to some who really need it , whose arms are empty and whose hearts are broken...

Bless you all

Oh, my Hell!

2009-04-09T19:35:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, the love on the internets was amazing...last I heard, over $20,000 was donated to the March of Dimes in little Maddie's name. That is just amazing. So much love...

Just thinking about what those poor parents are going through breaks my heart. I hope they can find a little peace in all of the love and hope sent their way. That little girl's beautiful smile has been seen and enjoyed by so many people. It might ease their hearts a little to hear how many lives she has touched...

I gave my boy lots of extra love yesterday.

It was not an easy thing to do.

Please don't misunderstand. I love my boy - I do, I do, I really, really do. But, I think I must have brought the wrong boy home from school.

I do not know who this child is.

My son is sweet and loving. He likes to cuddle and tell me stories, sing me songs...he helps me in the kitchen and plays with the dog.

Yesterday this child bit a little boy at school. Today, he bit one of his teaching aides.

He is not listening, not getting dressed, not going to bed, not eating, not getting in the car, not getting out of the car, throwing things, kicking, calling names, screaming, yelling, yodeling at the top of his lungs and threatening to run away from "this mean family".

I took away the computer and the tv and the planned cookie making. And now, apparently -I'm the devil.

He's totally pissed at me. And I told his dad and Daddy was MAD. Bad Mommy...

Is there some sort of hormone surge at five that no one told me about?

It is so hard not to take it personally. I know I shouldn't...but damn it's hard.

I really want to beat him (ok, maybe not beat so much as maybe duct tape him to the wall)

And evidently the dentist sharpened his teeth, so the biting is way good...

My hubby insists that there is "something" causing these issues and we need to find out what it is. I just don't know...maybe an exorcism?

The biggest picture

2009-04-08T15:00:00.000-07:00

I've been missing blogging (I know I posted, but it was short and not very interesting...)

Anyway, I was all set to hop on, after my absence( didn't notice, did you?) and bitch and moan about my jobs and my headache and my poor boy biting his tongue all up after the dentist and feeling like a bad mom and said boy biting someone at school...and on and on... (ad nausium)

I did, however, take a moment to gaze at my reader, as I have been missing you-all too - and found that there was, once again, sad news from one of our own.

Madeline Alice Spoor died today. She was 17 months old. I can't link you to her mama's website...it has crashed from all the visits from well-wishers.

My heart just hurts for this family. I can't imagine - I don't want to imagine...
She had such an infectious smile, a beautiful bright smile full of love and light.
There no words to ease the pain of losing a child, but maybe we can help lighten their load, a tiny bit with our support and love.

So, instead of babbling on, or reading all the posts I have missed, I'm going to go play with my boy...and give him an extra hug or seven...

see you all tomorrow.

PS - For those of you interested, the Spohrs have requested that in lieu of flowers, donations be made in Madeline’s name to the March of Dimes.

Or you can make a paypal donation here formaddie@hotmomreviews.com to help the family with the services...go hug someone you love...

Can I have some cheese with this..?

2009-04-07T15:53:00.000-07:00

The final trip to the dentist went well.

It's good to have the child that can entertain an entire dental office, high out of his mind. Bodes well for his popularity in the future...but gets you nothing off of the bill...

In fact, all was well until the drugs wore off. Evidently he spent his numb time chewing on his tongue and I didn't notice. Bad mom.

As I'm out the door for another cooking class tonight, hubby is left alone with crying child (two nights in a row, he's way cranky). I suggested just putting the tongue ring (or stud or post, whatever it is) in there now, to save him the pain when he's a teenager...but no one bit(get it? no one bit? Come on, that could have been kinda funny...)

Yeah, that was pathetic...I'm whiney too. I don't want to go to this class, I have a headache...and...well, I can't think of anything else, but I'm possibly upset by....something else...crap.

It should be Friday already and the sunshine is gone. On the plus side, by boss leaves for Argentina tomorrow. He'll be gone for 3 weeks. I'm either going to be reading many, many blog posts at work, or heinously busy. Hard to tell at this point...

Better get ready to go...I can't remember what class this is tonight...something Italian, I think...

Workin' for the Man

2009-04-05T21:07:00.000-07:00

Anyone else work way too hard this weekend?

I love my husband, I do - bless his little heart...But damn! He is a slave driver on Saturday and Sunday. God forbid I should need to get a drink or pee or something...especially as there is no longer a 'P' in my PMS - I do have to take a few extra bathroom breaks (and I hide out in there and check my blackberry for important emails and blog posts - the internets don't stop on the weekends)

"Where you going?"
"what are you doin'?'"
"Gonna be gone long?"
"Do you have to do that now?"

"Are you gonna help me or what?"
"You are the one that wanted these beds..."

The weather was lovely...seriously. I do bitch about the weather here, but that's just because I enjoy it (the bitching, I mean) we really have nothing to complain about and it was 68 and sunny today. Perfect.
That, however -dear Hubby - was no reason to threaten to get us up at 7:00am on a Saturday so we could be in the yard working by 8:00. We are only building a raised garden bed, not the friggin' ark! No one is sending 40 days of veggie starts...I think we'll get through if we start by 10. And really, it's still flippin' cold at 8 in April. Dude!

So, being the passive-aggressive pain in the ass I am, I kept him up way late by playing on his weakness... zombie movies (sorry, Keeley).

We all slept in until 8am.

We also just got a new juicer, so we drank fresh juice all weekend.

And I cooked. Roasted Chicken and pulled pork(not on the same day, really.)

And I made some jewelry. You had no idea I was so talented, did you? Well, I'm sure you suspected...so I'll forgive you for acting surprized. I had that little fake giveaway thingy, so I owe some people some gifts AND I'm helping with a Mom it Forward Fundraiser in Portland on 4/18/09, so I'm making some stuff for that. I'm gonna take some photos so you can be shocked - I mean - awed at my raw talent (hee hee)

So anyhow, both boys have fabulously red necks (SO funny) and everyone is exhausted and pleasantly cranky. But we have two new raised beds ready to plant, the raspberries have been cleaned out, weeded and re-strung, the front flower bed cleaned out and planted and we are working on a cover for the world's biggest sandbox. (or biggest catbox, depending on my mood).

All typed out, it doesn't sound like as much as it felt like...maybe all the whining and crying and hiding I did made it feel like a lot more...

not that it will stop me next time...someone has to complain or the man will think he can do whatever he wants!

I knew it...

2009-04-02T22:26:00.000-07:00

Yep, totally bawling...damned ER.
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Off my Game...

2009-04-02T20:11:00.000-07:00

What game you might ask...beats the hell out of me. I could have game, you don't know...

This is the fourth post I have written today. Don't go back and look - they didn't get posted. I'm just not happy with what I've been writing...(again...I know)

I posted about World Autism Awareness Day, but I don't really want to write about it anymore. I can't explain it right now. I just don't want to.

*****

I don't understand how you can be on Survivor and not know how to start a fire with a flint.
If you were going to tryout, wouldn't you be in your backyard lighting fires all the time? I would be reading my Boyscout manual cover to cover and starting fires until the neighbors called the fire department!

My hubby would kick ass on Survivor!

*****

Does anyone want to come over and let me cook for you? I won't make you do all the clean-up, I just want someone to talk to me while and cook and then tell em how good it is... (in my new kitchen) I take requests!

*****

Isn't that Major Tom song (Ground control to Major Tom) about him NOT making it back to Earth? Why would a car company use that song to sell their cars??

*****

What do you do when someone you really like "unfollows" you?

*****

(are you watching the final ER? - I haven't watched it in a few years, but gotta watch the last)
I will be bawling...I'm so easy

Amazing Family

2009-04-02T08:52:00.000-07:00

Today is World Autism Awareness Day...

My first post is a link to a wonderful video made by Danette for her beautiful boys. There is just nothing better.

...please watch.

Everyday Adventures: Our story - video for autism awareness

Danette, you have a wonderful, amazing family. Thank you for putting yourselves out there and giving hope and courage to the rest of us. Every time I have been a little down or a little frustrated, visiting your blog has helped to restore my faith and my hope.

You rock.

All my love,

Useless words...

2009-03-31T09:00:00.000-07:00

Ever since my son began to talk, he has been bombarded with words from all directions. Unfortunately, some of which make me crazy. Really, truly, absolutely crazy when I hear them.

I am a pretty laid back mom. Junior Troll poured a gallon-ish bottle of olive oil in the middle of my living room...what could I do? Baby powder all over the bathroom? Kinda messy, but it smelled good...no use crying over spilled milk, right? I don't get truly upset very often; the major exceptions being - unsafe behavior (running in the street or parking lot, non-food objects in the mouth, running with scissors - duh), disrespect to others and using "bad" words.

Certain words are on the "hell, no!" list at our house (yes, I do realize I used a swear word to illustrate "bad" words...baby steps, people)

Here are my top Five:

stupid
hate
retard
shut up (two words -sue me)
kill

I do realize that I have a potty mouth and that is a little hypocritical. However, I would rather (feel free to yell at me for this one) hear my son use my favorite swear word than call someone or something stupid.

Think about it.

Everyone knows swear words are just swearing. They are bad to be bad, to shock (and awe - only kidding) These other words are only used for hurting and in my mind, at least, there is a huge difference...

There is no reason I can even imagine to use the first four on the list. They are useless words whose only purpose is to hurt and belittle.

I do know there are actual, legitimate reasons to say "kill" - just not while pointing your little finger with your thumb cocked up running through the house shouting "kill the ninjas, save the princess..."

I stumbled across this whole thing - they say it much better than I can...

Sticks and stones, people - sticks and stones...

Who gets on this MomDot.com thing?

2009-03-30T17:53:00.000-07:00

I do!! That's who!!

Go here and find my listing... (just keep paging down, did you think I was the only one? Jeeesh.)

Looky, Lee at Mom's Without Blogs is on the same page...Hi, Lee!!

And the Creative Junkie, too! I love her stuff...

Damn, I'm in good company.

Anyhow, if you have not yet visited MomDot.com - you should be spanked and then you should go there, immediately, probably while standing up in front of your computer...but it will be worth it.

Trust me...

"MomDot is a mom blog listing site that is run by mommy bloggers, Trisha, Alicia, and Bridgette. They run contests weekly, reviews on awesome (and not so awesome) products for families and kids, and talk about their lives. But more importantly, they feature bloggers and mom boutiques to give them an avenue to get their names out there, also assisting in google links! You can head out and list your blog for free and talk to them about doing an interview about you. Head on over and see what MomDot is about!"

Do it!

Got blues?

2009-03-30T13:56:00.000-07:00

I hate being a whiner...

Ok. No I don't. But, when I whine I like to be the brunt of my own whiney-ness - to make it entertaining, if you will. To whine about something you can relate to and get a laugh out of it...

Not so much today. I'm just blue. There is nothing wrong. I have no complaints. In fact, my little corner is doing pretty damned good...but...

I'm blue...

Actually, a little more than blue.

Let's stop talking about me for a second, to talk more about me. My blog doesn't seem to be going anywhere. personally, I mean. I wonder to myself, why that is. And I argue with myself about why I can't seem to let go a little bit more. I mean, as fascinating as conversations with my five year old can be - isn't there more? If that is all I have to say, then why am I constantly suppressing all these conversations in my head...

I read so many blogs. So many different kinds of blogs. There are many of you that I feel like I know, I feel like you are my friends, real friends. I think perhaps the problem is that I'm really afraid that isn't really true. If I talk about my kid and my silly family and no one really reads or comments...well - that's alright! There are a million women out here talking about our kids, it doesn't mean anything!

But, if I come out and tell you what I really think and feel and what I'm really afraid of and what I want and then you don't read or you don't comment - I can't escape the conclusion that you don't like me.

God, that's just so middle school! Will someone please slip me a note and tell me to grow up!?

I spent a few years really supressing a lot of my feelings. Then I got pregnant (and had too many feelings). I don't have any girlfriends out here to talk to and I seem to have lost that part of me that was spontaneous and could easily talk to people.

I feel like I'm adrift and I don't know what to hold onto...should I even BE blogging?

Then again, I could blame this whole pity party on PMS and go bake a cake...

Freakin' Amazing

2009-03-27T09:43:00.000-07:00

I'm sure everyone has already seen this, but I can't resist it. It makes me laugh everytime I see it. It's so funny and so true.

I think we should remember this everyday when we get frustrated with "things"...

Not that I'm going to stop freaking out when my laptop takes a poo for no reason, or my hubby 'jokes' about giving up my Blackberry...

But maybe,just maybe - we could spare a moment to marvel at the amazing world we live in, instead of just flipping it the bird when our iphone drops a call in our car in the drivethru getting our morning latte or we can't update our Facebook for the third time that day and Twitter kicked us out again for reaching our limit.

Toddler Drugs: the Redux

2009-03-25T20:59:00.000-07:00

Off to the dentist again tomorrow.

This should take care of all the issues (knock on wood). I never have to do this again, right? Well, thank God. I just don't think I can take years of this stuff. My mom never took me to the dentist and look how I turned out (no one needs to comment on that last item).

I can't believe I didn't post about last weeks visit...

Does everyone know about *looking around to make sure no one is listening* the 'good" drugs'at the dentists office?? I had no idea. These things are so amazingly good that my five year old leaned back in his dental chair and said

"oh, duuuuude"

In total stoner voice. Staring at his hand waving in the air...

It was so funny that the hubby and I laughed, the doctor and nurse laughed and they called in a few more peoples to check him out.

I felt so bad laughing. Not that it stopped me. I was so torn between laughing and throwing up.

"Mommy, I can feel...magic..."

Uh-huh. Sure baby, just be still. Poor hubby had to leave the room a couple of times. There is just something about watching your kid on the table like that....

He did really well in the chair. He only tried to help the dentist a couple of times. He is so considerate. They didn't even have to use much Novocain.

On our way out of the office, AJ asked about a little girl who was laying on a table (very open office) having something done to her.

The dentist explained what they were doing to her
and her parents told him her name and that she would love to be his friend
and the nurse said she was ok and nothing bad was happening to her...

He turned to look at me and said -

"But why does she have two heads?"

Do they have a prescription in my size?

We Don't Eat Family...

2009-03-24T09:36:00.000-07:00

UPDATE:

This morning, that very same little girl had handmade crafts for "your son" (that what she said to me - "I made this for your son" weird). She made him a set of imaginary dentist tools and hugged him and said she loved him...I personally think she's working the dentist husband angle a little too hard!

__________________________________

My five year old had a fight at school yesterday.

A fight with words, rather than fists, which I appreciate. Although I'm still at a loss as to how to make things better.

We had watched Planet Earth (which if you have never seen - GO find it now, the photography is amazing) the night before and there was a segment about dolphins. All night and all morning, AJ had been babbling about hydroplaning and dorsal fins and fishy stuff like that. When we got to school, one of the little girls his age was in the office and they started talking.

She immediately started talking about her new lip gloss (I kid you not) and he started in on the dolphin thing. She heard dolphin and countered with "Orcas aren't dolphins they are killer whales"

AJ, skipping the "duh" part of that whole thing (it was on his face) said "and they eat Humpback Whales."

That's where everything fell apart.

Little girl started shrieking that they "DID NOT" eat humpback whales, they were "all family" and "family doesn't eat each other".

To be honest, I was having a hard time not laughing at this point... but AJ was not backing down. Boy loves him some Discovery Channel and we had watched a program with Orcas killing humpback whale babies (thanks honey, I loved that one - where is my damned American Idol when I need it) - he knew he was right and that was that. He is opinionated at the best of times.

Anyhow, neither child was backing down. Girlfriend was spouting "Get over it!" " I just can't believe you" and "Wake up!" Aj looked a little confused at the theatrics, so I said "lets just go out to the fieldhouse and see what all the other kids are doing..."

She stomped out and slammed the door behind her with a shriek of faux anger. Day-am, the drama they must have in their house!

AJ says to me "she slammed the door on me, mama." I said, it's ok, she didn't really mean to, she was just having a moment (code in our house for tantrum).

He whispers - "she's just mad because she's wrong. Girls are like that."

Oh, they grow up so quickly....

shouldn't they be fighting about Pokemon or Dora or bikes or something? I don't have the first clue how to referee that kind of argument!

The Messiest Blog Party (It's the Ultimate) - UPDATED

2009-03-22T15:41:00.000-07:00

Hello party animals - I'm Sticky!

I mean, my name is Sticky, I'm not like actually, physically sticky - except that bit on my shirt...and my shoe...Oh hell. Fine. Just call me Sticky.

Welcome to my party room at the Ultimate Blog Party 2009 - hosted by Five Minutes for Mom . It's been really crazy so far... This is my first party and I'm still trying to catch up! If you haven't been over the check out the main party room, just click on their button over there on the left. The party is great, there are a ton of gifts and it's a great place to hang out, even when there isn't a party...

Enough about them, what about Sticky, you may ask?

I never did my 100 things about me 100th post, so let's see if I can get to 50 this week. (yes, I completely whimped out!!) I'll start small and continue to add throughout the week, so come back and check on me!! It might get a little strange...

1. I have been blogging less than a year. I'm still trying to figure everything out. Sometimes I read and comment more than I write, but there are so many interesting people out there!

2. I am a 40 (something) mom and wife. My husband and I have been married 10 years. It was the first marriage for both of us and we only have the one child (AJ is five) I used to have a career, now I have a few part-time jobs. It works.

3. I don't say anything I don't mean. I started this blog as a way to express myself. I spend most of my days with children and old people and sometimes I just need to talk about how I feel, ya know? Sometimes it might not be pretty (or PG) but it's always the truth and always from my heart.

4. I started working in the food industry when I was 12 and have (mostly) been there ever since. I'm almost sure there isn't a restaurant job I haven't done at least once.

5. I swear too much.

6. I'm addicted to my Blackberry. ("crackberry" thanks, Honey)

7. I have a tendency to believe that the bloggers I read everyday, are really my friends in real life.

8. My hubby loves me, but thinks I'm a nut. And, apparently, he thinks I look like this: (thanks for the ego boost, hon)

Hey CC, need a sidekick? I'll fly over after dinner...

9. My son has autism spectrum disorder and is the funniest person I know.

10. I can't tell if my dog thinks she's a person or a cat.

11. I use a lot of sarcasm. (no, really - a LOT).

12. I try to stay positive. There is no sense in getting mad over something I can't change. That being said, I do have a wicked temper once I get going.

13. I'm a great email friend, but not so good on the phone.

14. I'm a great cook. And I LOVE to create new recipes.

15. I'm occasionally crafty.

16. I have never lost my (having a) baby weight (I know he's five, but that's when it started, so it IS technically baby weight).

17. I read too much (ebooks on my Blackberry)

18. I quit a really great job in Salt Lake City and drug (dragged?) my poor hubby out here to Oregon to care for my 90 yo Grandpa. We lived with him for 4 1/2 years until he died. Miss ya grampa...

19. I got pregnant on my birthday, after 4 years of trying. We blame it on the smurf-blue ice cream cake (thanks Kelli).

20. I have recently become my Gramma's legal guardian. When did I become so responsible one?

21. I.m secretly terrified that I'm dull and boring. Having such a hard time with this list isn't helping that fear...

Ok, lets do some quickies...I'm all about the quicky (maybe that should be #22!)

22. I love Survivor and American Idol (I also have been known to peak at that Bret Michaels Train Wreck Show - I can't help it, don't hate me)

23. I read all the Twilight books (still no hating...) I don't think they were the best things ever, but I was entertained. I am easy, though...

24. I really am easy. Really. Cheap date, cheap drunk, easily entertained...I forgive almost anything, I put up with almost anything, watch almost anything...sad, really.

25. Unless you are a waiter. Holy hell you had better give me good service! And I am picky about restaurant food...

26. I love to be needed. I would give you something of mine that I totally loved if you really needed it.

27. Along those lines - I have a hard time saying no. "yes, Gramma I will drive across town on a Monday night to bring you change for a $5.00, no problem"

28. I was on the rowing team in College and qualified for the Olympic Trials. (didn't go, but I'm still proud I qualified). I do have 7 or 8 gold medals from races I was in.

29. I love camping with my family. We have a whole elaborate kitchen set-up and spend like 60% of our time cooking. If you camp with us, you never go hungry!

30. I drank a gallon of milk every 2 day the last 3 months of my pregnancy.

31. I couldn't eat spicy food before I got pregnant - now I crave it, constantly.

32. Does anyone have a martini? I could really use a martini..just gin and olives, really...

33. Or a mojito? I love mint and lime...

34. I am totally useless when it comes to building things or installing things or any kind of things that involve measuring tapes, levels, screwdrivers or reading instructions...and I've just temporarily escaped hubby who has been holding me hostage in the kitchen trying to install shelves...send help...and liquor...and help with liquor...uh oh - busted.

35. I am no good at pretending I'm interested or listening when I'm not...sorry honey.

Whew - he's off cutting something in the garage - he just can't understand what's taking me so long. I guess I should be grateful he thinks I'm interesting...

36. Hubby likes to tell stories about me making men cry. Many of you just got the complete wrong idea. And in all fairness, I was mean BUT they all clearly deserved what they got...out of the two guys he talks about -the first would not stop grabbing my ass and tried to stick his hand down my shirt. So, yes. I made him cry. With my words. and a pool cue. The second was the contractor that ruined my kitchen the first time through and them tied to make me pay for it. I should not have to explain that one.

37. I personally prefer the stories about running into ex-employess in the bars in Salt Lake and having them brag about how I fired them. What?! They were bragging! No one had hurt feelings, I was a totally fair boss!

38. I love Jason Statham, Jeffrey Donovan and Hugh Laurie (and secretly that Pattinson boy from Twilight is really cute)

39. I have a blue heeler, named River. She is an Australian Cattle Dog. They warn you about cattle dogs and small children because they are herding dogs...

40. I figured, what the heck I could use the help!

41. You should see her pulling AJ across the yard by his pants!

42. We adopted her from a dog rescue and she goes to work with me everyday.

43. I have three part time jobs

44. In the mornings, I run an office for a couple of guys who do insurance adjusting.

45. In the afternoons, I cook, clean and visit an 88 year old mom of one of my bosses. (she lives in assisted living)

46. And sometimes in the evening, I help teach cooking classes at a kitchen store.

47. My husband is nine years younger than I am. Yeah, I said nine...

48. When I found out how old he was, I decided we were NOT going to have a relationship of any kind. 11 years later...

49. My son is cute and very funny. He is five years old and he loves his Mommy and likes to stay up really late (sorry, he made me add that part)

50. I am dumbfounded by the direction my life has taken, but I could not be happier!!

OMG - I just can't do anymore... If I write more there will be no mystery, no intrigue...yep, you guessed it. I can't think of anything else...

Oh wait - the prizes, need to win prizes
me likey...
#4 - tee shirt from tottieBean
#5 - Core Fitness DVD from Busy Mommy
#8 - personalized Labels from Stuck on You
#19 $50 Target GC (no doubt!!) from Shoot me Now
#21 $50 target GC from Agoosa
#27 Diaper cake from Diaper Cakewalk (I gots 2 babyshowers coming up)
#47 green Monkey Headphones from Seccy Mama
#49 Shred DVD - ME WANTS!!!!

USC 50- Queen of the Castle Book - I could use the help (oh boy, could I)
USC 63 - Mommy Cards

Actually any prizes for baby boys - I have two wonderful friends having little boys this summer...

"...the best Mommy I have"

2009-03-17T20:07:00.000-07:00

According to my son, that's exactly what I am.

Big vote of confidence, don't you think?

Maybe others are a little more confident in my abilities. (maybe? come on...!)

My friend Lee over at Moms Without Blogs thinks I'm a great mom! In fact, she thinks I'm

What?!?

I think that's exactly what my son's face would look! But, thank you SO very much! You said the nicest things about me and I appreciate it more than I can even tell you...

Whew, two awards in two days - I hardly know what to say...

Oh I know what to say! Crap, I forgot I have to follow the rules...and here they are -

The details of this award dictate that I list ONE thing I do NOT like about myself as a mom and SEVEN things I DO like about myself as a mom. Or something like that.

But, I decided to twist things my own way yet again. Hubby is just sitting here doing nothing(totally critiquing American Idol, don't tell), so let's let him answer...

the bad - "quit cussing so much" Really? That's it? Jesus, like that's frelevant...this from the man that let my FIVE year old watch Gangland on the History Channel the other night and now has been flashing me gang sign (of course I had no clue). Yeah, I swear too much. Dammit.

The Best - "Absolute dedication to the boy, without question." Wow, that was nice. I guess he might be getting a little somthin'-somthin' later...

The Good- "Your patience. I love that you have it cuz I don't" Ain't that the truth! No, kidding, he really does great, but I've had years babysitting servers in restaurants...patience by the bucketful.

The Strange-"the fun things you guys do together, being goofy just laughing having fun... I don't know how to say it..." I call it - the way we sing, the way we dance, the crafts we pull out of my ass - I mean pants!

And Lastly - I was going to leave it at my ass, but he added "I like it that you are a presence at his school. That you hang out with him and all the other kids, that they know your name -that you know what he's doing and who he plays with - that's amazing" Ok, now he's just going for the extra bootie points - that's just ridiculous...

No, that was really nice. So much love around here...just chokes me up *sniff* Don't touch my wine, son-of-a- ! ooops

Now that hard part - passing it on. I'm going to cheat and steal from Lee, she really said it the best -

"And now I am supposed to hand it out to other mamas. Well, come on now - if
you're reading this post, you deserve this award. Plain and simple. If you're a
mama making it through the day and loving your kids inside out, then take this,
it's yours too.

Don't you know that's the point by now?

That you are ALL "Moms of the Year!?"

I certainly hope you know that. But in case you need a little reminding, I'm
reminding you."

Ain't she the best? She knows of which she speaks - so take the award already!!

But there are a couple Ladies who need a personal touch this week...

Rambler I love you, girl and your complete dedication to that beautiful little girl.

Jennifer at Playgroups are not for Children. You are such a great mom...and you give so many of us hope for ourselves.

CC, you constantly inspire me to look outside the box and you give all of us such great ways to connect with our kids and help them learn while having fun with them! You totally rock and you totally have (If Only I had)Superpowers

Oh. Hold on. Wait. Can I give a "Mom of the Year Award" to a dad? I'm sure there is a Dad award out there somewhere, but I think Ryan at Pacing the Panic Room could use a little extra love this week, too. He is a great dad and soon to be a greater dad (the more kids you have the better you are, right?) and I just want to acknowledge that.

NO pressure for anyone to pass this on or anything - just sending some extra love...

ps - taking AJ to dentist tomorrow - wish us luck

My St.Paddy's Bling

2009-03-17T14:24:00.000-07:00

AJ made this for me this morning in school. Pretty awesome, no?

He was extremely upset when he found out he was not invited to be in any SPD parades. I did suggest he ask his teacher if he and the other kids could have their own parade.

She loves me, don't ya think?
Sent via BlackBerry by AT&T

Lookie - Lookie, what I gots!

2009-03-15T15:06:00.001-07:00

I got some really great comments about my weekend - Thanks y'all...you sure know how to make a girl feel good.

Diane over at Good Mourning, Glory
went one step farther and sent me this great award!

I have seen a lot of different awards passed around, but this one really made me feel wonderful...

"The Love Ya Award goes a little somethin' like this...

These blogs are exceedingly charming. These kind bloggers aim to find and be friends. They are not interested in self-aggrandizement. Our hope is that when the ribbons of these prizes are cut, even more friendships are propagated. Please give more attention to these writers. Deliver this award to eight bloggers who must choose eight more and include this cleverly-written text into the body of their award."

I just love rules, don't you?

There are always rules, of course, but the spirit of this award is really nice.

Sometimes I feel like I'm the outside of the window watching all of you. I feel a little disconnected like I think I know you, but in reality I'm just some strange lady leaving comments on your blogs...

Wait...I am some strange lady, leaving comments...well, you know where I was going with that, right?

Long story gone really long - this award made me feel really good, a part of things.

Thank you, Diane.

So I'm passing it on...

But -

I'm going to break the rules (imagine that!) Sorry Diana, I hope you don't get mad, but here's the deal...All of you that comment here are really, really nice. I have emailed almost all of you and you almost all write me back. I have yet to run into a blogger that hasn't been really nice and really friendly and of course there are a few of you that I "feel" closer to (even if that's all in my head and I'm just a big stalker, I don't care)...

My eventual POINT is that you all deserve this award, please take it and pass it on if you like... you should know how I love you (I will leave more comments, I promise!))

I would like to give all my awardy love to one person in particular. One who won't be able to follow the rules, either (like she would if she could!) My lovely friend B. She doesn't have a blog of her own, she just comes here to give support for mine. She is "exceedingly charming" and is just here for the love (and cheep laughs at my expense). She was my very first internet friend and she gave me the confidence to open myself up to all of you and never be afraid of sharing my heart and swearing in public. If we never meet in person Sweetie, always know that I couldn't love you more if I had known you since gradeschool...You are one awesome girlfriend and one tough chick. Keep on getting better so I can get up there to give you a real hug!

I love you.

Here we go....wheeeee!!

2009-03-13T08:37:00.000-07:00

Ok, that was all the excitement and energy I had. Oooff.

It is 8:30 on Friday Morning - do you remember when you were SO happy that it was Friday? What happened to that feeling?
I have a sneaking suspicion it went the way of Happy Hours and sleeping in on Sundays...that often wistfully remembered pre-child weekend. Ahhh, I remember them well.

Hubby left early this morning for his weekend of pool playing. At the beach. Damn him. See, there's the difference. He is staying at a casino, at the beach, for the weekend, playing pool. As fun as that sounds, as crazy as I would get, if it were me - I will bet you $100 the man won't have more than maybe two beers (probably not even that) and if he gambles -$20 max. I don't know how he does it. When I tell people my husband plays pool, well, you can just see the look. I know, he spends his evenings in bars. Me? I'd be coming home loaded every time. Him? Maybe one beer. Maybe. Don't you think that's weird?

He's gone for his fun weekend and I'm home alone with the Terminator. Oh, and guess what? I'm sick. yea. It's just starting and I'm trying like hell to keep it at bay...but it's coming. My throat hurts. My head hurts and my nose is all stuffed up. And yes - I will have some cheese with my whine, Thank you...

What to do with a crazed 5 year old on a rainy weekend alone...
His latest is that he is getting points for every piece of garbage he picks up. Not only is he "saving the earff" he is getting points towards - ...something, I can't remember - passing this chapter, I think. No, I don't know what it means, other than I probably let him play too many games on the computer. Not that I am in any way complaining about saving the earff - I'm all about giving the litterbugs a giant smackdown, I'm all for the "earff". I may just like saying earff...

I did get a note from his school that they want the autism specialist to do (another) in-home evaluation. They are concerned with his inability to completely leave his fantasy world, when he's at school. What that has to do with autism, I have no idea at all. He does seem to be having a lot of issues, lately.

On a separate note, anyone else loving Seether's version of George Micheal's Careless Whisper? Love it. If I knew how to put it on here, I would.

Oh look, I think I did it. Looks like that cold medicine isn't doing the damage I thought it was...

Did I mention I made cookies for my husband to take with him? To the casino? At the beach? Damn, I'm totally jealous, huh? (and who does that? the cookies, I mean? Am I nuts?)
We were gonna go too - but it's so expensive right now. They just laid off a bunch more people at Hubby's work. We are trying not to think about unemployment opportunities...

Of course, here I sit at work, writing my blog! Times are tough everywhere, no?

Hey, did I ever blog about that vibrator I won last month? Oh crap, boss is back...

That's what I'm Talkin' about!!

2009-03-10T20:28:00.000-07:00

Sheeeesh - I think Ive finally got it!

I have been blogging about my kitchen, so here are some photos...

The pictures of the copper backsplash didn't come out as well as I had hoped, but you should get an idea.

I'll post more next week when the shelves are up!

What do you think? No one has really seen it yet - I need feedback!

Oooo - shiny...

2009-03-09T15:03:00.000-07:00

Random shots of my weekend, as I am too easily distracted to write a real post...

***

TV Announcer: "A good body is a lean, tone, firm body..."

AJ: "A good body is also soft and squishy, Mama." (totally patted my tummy as he said it. He might have added bulgey in there, somewhere. I think I blocked it out)

***

Fortune Cookie - "Every moment of joy comes with a price"

Seriously??!

***

"What is it called when it's sunny and raining and snowing at the same time, Mama?"

"Oregon"

***

Overheard in Ikea

"Do we really need this many shelves for the kitchen? We can't possibly have that much stuff!"

"waaaaaa" "I don't wanna go yet! Go shop some more!"
"(is that our kid yelling)" (of course)

"If I need an ice cream because I'm grumpy - then that lady needs two ice creams"

"Are you actually buying something here, or can you get out of my way?"

"How come everyone is eating meatballs?"

"if it's furnature from Sweden, why is it made in China?"

***

It's only an hour - How come daylight savings gives me a hangover?

***

Why do old ladies have to tell you everything 4 times before they remember they told you already?

***

"I really ate this before? Was I sick?"

***

"Is it American Idol night? Survivor night? Well, can I watch a kids show then? I don't like the other grown up shows."

***

My husband is going out of town this weekend. I'm really looking forward to it. Do you think thats bad?

***

Ok - I have to say this...my hubby can't fix my computer, he doesn't earn a six figure salary, he can't tell me what shoes to wear with my outfit, we can't work my Blackberry

BUT...

The man can install, fix, build, take apart and put back together anything! Almost every piece of this two year kitchen remodel has his fingerprints all over it. He did the electrical, the plumbing, installed the cabinets, the drywall, painted, leveled the floors (90 year old house)and made the butcher block countertops.
I had a little idea about a custom backsplash. He not only loved my idea, but he planned it, built it, installed it and made it look so professional - I get a little tear in my eye when I look at it!

(of course, being a man, he just had to say "now you can cook some good food...")

He's still alive, but limping a little bit... (well, it isn't finished yet!!)

Shove over Sven, that's my lamp thingy!!

2009-03-05T20:41:00.000-08:00

I'm going to Ikea, I'm going to Ikea!!

Do you have any idea what I'm talking about? I just assume my shopping addictions are the same as everyone else's...

Ikea is a "store". A 280,000 square foor store with over 10,000 products for your home, 3 model homes, 53 room settings, a (totally cheap) restautrant and supervised childcare. Thats right -I'll say it again...supervised childcare!

Go here - Ikea - and take a look. It's amazing.

I'm packing up the family Saturday morning and driving to Portland. We're making a day of shopping. I'm getting the stuff to finish my kitchen (if it kills me - and it might).

Have I mentioned that we have been remodeling my kitchen for two years now? Yeah, two stinkin' years next month...it's been long and painful, let me tell ya!

We are so close to being done. It has really been just cosmetic work for quite a while, but we have been really hesitant to spend the money to finish. In some ways it's been a really good experience. We have actually done some really cool things that we wouldn't have done, had the remodel gone as planned and been over in 4 months.

Our house was built in the 20's, so we have some interesting quirks. I should really post some before and afters so you can see the "amazing transformation".

The reason I bring this up is because I had an epiphany (bless you - excuse me).

We have been on the 'save a little, buy a little' program and I have had it. I hate it that nothing is finished. it really won't take THAT much to finish and I'm am going to buy it tomorrow, come hell or high water...

(i'm going to Ikea...la la la...)

WTF?

2009-03-04T16:43:00.000-08:00

Fighting with son all afternoon...if it's not one thing, it's another...

Everytime I was on the phone - yelling, screaming, throwing things...everything has to be a battle today. Kitchen utensils used to gouge holes in things, chasing the dog with a "sword" bouncing on the furniture...

Final straw, threw a book at the tv.

"Go sit on the stairs"

"No, Mama. No"

"riiight"

Walked over, shut off tv. Grabbed book from hand, placed on top of cabinet, out of reach.

"Now! Go. Sit. On. The. Step."

"Waaaaaaaaaaaa!! You meanie!! I don't like you any more" Runs to step, crying something about bad mommies, DFS and no more kisses.

(phone rings. Husband. Of course) Try to have conversation about why he isn't home, when he's coming home...can't understand a word over the heartbroken sobs...

The crying and moaning and yelling continue through the conversation..Hubby is laughing...damn him...Hang up. (still no idea what's going on)

Two minutes later (tantrums pass quickly around here, we just have extra for impact)

Sigh

Loud sigh

"Mama?"

"Mama. I need to tell you someting.."

"Mama?"

(silence)

"Mama!!!"

(crickets chirping)

"Mama, I'm sorry. Really, really, really sorry..."

(coyote howling in the distance)

(sobbing)"Does this mean you aren't gonna marry me anymore?"

Oh, for Christ's sake...(pardon my french)

"Baby, we talked about this. I'm your Mom, you can't marry me."

"But when I'm as old as you, I can marry you and we'll live together and you can make waffles with whip cream. And you'll alway, always love me."

"ok, I'm not going to argue with you. We'll talk about it when you grow up. You'll change your mind by then and I'll always love you anyway."

"But you'll love me more when you marry me."

Where does he get this stuff?

"we'll talk about it when you're my age."

"But that will take too long. It will take ages and ages and ages...

and ages...

and ages...and..."

I left.

I can hear, from the kitchen...still talking...

"and ages and ages..."

Damn, I'm old.

I need a splint for my tongue

2009-03-03T10:05:00.000-08:00

Minds out of the gutter, people!

"Very well, Sir.
Step this way.
We'll find another game to play. "

In honor of the Dr.'s birthday, we read this book 4 times last night.

Four times people!

Have you READ this book? Do you understand the tongue calisthenics involved??
I may need a transplant.
I was too damned tired to even read my own book when we were done, luckily I had Rambler emails to entertain me (Dude, your new page is SO pretty!).

This Little Man's very favorite Dr. Suess book.
He loves the tongue twisters and cheering me on (screaming in my ear) to "read it faster! Faster!" until my poor tongue is in knots and bleeding!

I have to admit to enjoying it too...(in a wincing - I need another week to recover, sorry honey -kind of way)

Something about Dr. Suess books just pull you in, makes you smile and laugh and nod your head to the lessons learned.

They just get to you, ya know?

So here's to you, Dr. Suess...

Where is the love...?

2009-03-02T14:54:00.000-08:00

Seriously?!

My very first giveaway? A freebie!

...and only get two people are interested?? Two??? I thought there were at least 5 of you reading.

I'll take pity, anything - this is embarrassing....

I promise not to send leftover spaghetti or old socks...I'll even add two more people if only you would show me some love...

I did say jewelry...and choices...

What's a girl gotta do, offer naked pics?

GIVEAWAY!! (sorta)

2009-03-01T22:08:00.000-08:00

Cool, now that I have your attention...

Kidding. It is a giveaway...you just won't know what it is. And I don't know what it is...that's a little weird, huh?

My friend Candace at My Four Sons...and a Husband is having a fun little game on her blog. As I'm the girl that can't stand being left out - I'm playing along...

So,here's how it works..... The first 3 people to leave a comment on this post will receive a hand made gift from me during this year. When and what will be a surprise.
There's a small catch...You knew there would be didn't you? Re-post this on your blog (link to me, naturally), offering to Play it Forward to three of your readers, then come back and let me know you're in. Fun, huh? Remember, only the first 3 comments receive the gift.

So, my understanding is that since I have now posted, I get a gift from Candace AND I get to make 3 of you gifts...that's pretty cool...

Warning-

I do not knit, sew or crochet. I do bake and I make jewelry and some odd,random crafty crap. What can I say, I'm a little odd.
The winners will be given a couple choices of crazy gifts they could receive...

You totally want to play, don't you??

Well, let's see it! Don't leave me hangin'...

Tweet my Post

Do I have to go where they tell me? or I don't wanna, you can't make me

2009-02-25T10:24:00.000-08:00

I keep staring at this blank page...

I have lots of things rolling around in my head, as usual. I just have problems getting them out. Part of the issue seems to be that none of these things are very interesting. Really - I'm quite dull. There is no drama, no intrigue, no shouting matches or drunken half-naked shenanigans...I did poke my husband in the eye this morning, while we were sleeping. It was an accident (he did accuse me of subconsciously wanting to poke him, which I do not deny) but there wasn't any yelling, only a few whimpers -which I stopped as soon as he quieted down long enough to let me go back to sleep (selfish much?).

Don't get me wrong, I'm all in favor of drama free living (for me - -you need drama so I have something to entertain me) - it just doesn't make very interesting blogging. I'm sure you don't want to hear a story about my 5 year old future stalker telling his teaching aid she is "pretty when she's sleeping"(they were in the nap room!)

I do have a few bits of Mommy angst. My son is in a Montessori school. I can't begin to tell you much he has changed and grown in the year since we moved him there. We love them. He also has a few aides from an Early Intervention Program, because of his autism.

Here is my problem (or problem 1 on the list of related issues):

Technically, he can't go to kindergarten at this school next year. This school is not a charter school and so has no contract with the school board in our district. That means if we want him to go there, he has to go like it's a private school - full tuition, no services for his autism. I think 7 grand for kindergarten is a wee bit beyond my means.

We can go to kindergarten at the regular elementary school. Kids have done it foe years, right? It could be great. I know that. In my heart I know that.

But here is where I have concerns. AJ has high functioning autism. The good news is that he is verbal, he does well academically, he makes eye contact, tells me he loves me and gets along (most of the time) with the kids at school. The bad news is that he is more likely to be seen only as a child that has or causes problems, not as a child that just needs a little extra help or a little more time to work through an issue.

This happened at the school he went to before Montessori. It was very hard on all of us, heartbreaking really. (I never knew little kids could be that mean)

The town next to us has a Montessori school that goes all the way to eigth grade AND it is a charter school, so it counts as a public school. Unfortunately, we aren't in the same school district. We can apply and maybe get a spot. They hold a lottery for open positions, with preference given to in-district kids. And then, if by some miracle we got a place - we would have to petition our district school board to let him go and to pay for it.

Confused yet? God knows I am. And it's only February...school doesn't even start until September. I think I had 4 phone calls about this yesterday and I have three meetings next week about it.

I don't want to be that mom. I don't want him in a bubble. I don't want to excuse his every move, every tantrum or every bad behavior with "autism". It just seems to me that the Montessori methods, their insistance on self discipline, self reliance and respect work for him. He is able to work through his sensory issues there and learn. He loves to learn. He is addicted to the Discovery Channel and the Science Channel. I want the school he goes to - to be able to help him cope with the hard stuff, so he can get the education he needs and wants. Right now he is so interested in reading and writing and learning, I don't want him to lose that. I just want him to have a fair shot.

I doubt we will get into that school. But I'm not going to stop pushing until I find the right place for him.

I think the school board is tired of me already. Are we supposed to just send our kids wherever they tell us to go? Just because it's the closest school, doesn't mean it's the right place...at least I don't think it does...hell, I'm so confused now...

Maybe I'm making too big a deal of this...

Can I call it spontaneous??

2009-02-22T20:02:00.000-08:00

I want to know how everyone else writes their blogs...

Do you write ahead? Schedule your posts?

You you follow the same plan each week? Do you ever cheat?

Do you plan them out? write outlines?

How long does it take you to get a post published?

I think maybe I need to do better planning...

Sometimes I have ideas about things I would like to write about...sometimes things happen that I KNOW I have to write about...obviously I find websites, posts or blogs that I just have to share with everyone...

But, lots of times (ok, almost all the time) I just open up the laptop and see what happens.

So many people have such wonderful daily posts: Sunday Ramblings, Musical Mondays, Tribute Tuesdays, Teaching Tuesdays, Totally Awkward Tuesdays, Mama Kat's Writer's Workshop, Wordful and Wordless Wednesday, Wednesday Winners, Thousand Word Thursday, Photostory Friday and I can't leave out Monday Morning Eye Candy (yummy!! - Thanks Angie). I know there are many, many more out there...I just can't seem to get with the program and keep up with everyone.

I think I spend too much of my limited online time reading blogs, not writing them.

I really do want to thank everyone that comes here anyway and reads my aimlessly rambling posts...

I would love to hear about how you blog, what DO you do...?

Give a girl some inspiration....

Something a little violent

2009-02-16T22:25:00.000-08:00

Once upon a time there was a girl...

No, wait ... I have a "friend"...

Ok. Fine, already...me. It was me.

About 15 years ago I quit my job, packed my things and moved away from all my friends and family to a city I had never been to, with no job and no one I knew - except for my boyfriend.

The boyfriend that beat me up.

I thought I was a pretty tough girl. I always said I would never let anyone hit me. I was so much smarter than" that girl". It would never happen to me.

It started so small, it was almost unnoticeable. We had a big fight, I made him very angry and he swung me around and threw me into a door. It seemed like an accident, I mean I'm the one who started the fight, right? Then the next time. Then the next. Soon I was hiding in the closet and covering bruises with makeup. telling myself that he didn't mean it and that he would never do it again. telling my friends and my coworkers that I was "fell down the stairs" or "walked into the door". It was classic - -but I just couldn't see it.

With each incident I was more invested in the lie. More scared and humiliated by the truth. More sure that there was no where to go and no one to help.

I didn't have any friends, I had no one to tell (to be honest, I wouldn't have anyway). It was, and still is actually- a difficult thing to talk about. I thought it was my fault.

I had no idea that he was getting high. Well, snorting (and cooking coke) Snorting coke and beating the crap out of me. There's a pretty picture, huh?

I was so naive that I didn't even know until months later that he had a drug problem. I had never seen him do drugs...

I guess that's all beside the point...

I got survived. I got away.

But, I did it alone. It would be wonderful if that didn't ever have to happen to anyone else. At least they should know they aren't alone.

Yeah. Not the usual post for me, I know.

Maggie at Ok, Fine, Dammit - a wonderful person and great writer, has gone out on a limb and started a truly inspirational website.

"Violence UnSilenced was created with the sole intention of shedding light on the epidemics of domestic violence and sexual assault by giving their survivors a voice."

She has only had it up a couple of days and the response has been incredible.

It makes me happy that there is a place like this to go - but so sad that there are so many in need of it.

Please take a moment and visit. Read a story. Leave a comment. Show support.

There are so many women all around us that need help...

Who can I blame THIS one on?

2009-02-16T14:50:00.001-08:00

I saw this over at Stiletto Mom and had to try it... it's called Wordle and it's pretty fun!

From Drop Box

I'm looking at all these words and drawing a blank...

I'm sure I never said most of those things.

(I blame TattooedMiniVanMom for all the dirty words!)

Loving clitar right in the middle!

Comment Love for Autism

2009-02-14T19:59:00.000-08:00

I got this email a little while ago... (thanks Julie at The Cool Mom Guide, you rock!)

Elizabeth at Party Planning Professor has accepted a challenge from Rawtism.com that will help raise money for AutismSpeaks.

She has a great post on Autism at her site. For every comment left on that post, Rawtism.com will donate $0.25 to AutismSpeaks. Elizabeth's goal is to collect 400 comments by 12:00 am EST Monday.

PLEASE go and visit this post and leave a comment, it is a great post and it will take 2 minutes of your time. If you have a blog and you feel so inclined, I would consider it a great personal favor if you would spread the word so that even more people are aware.

We all work hard hard to get fit and together can accomplish so much, let's help a friend achieve her goal! Two minutes from you can give so much to support Autism! We only have a little over 24 hours!

I'm very happy with anything that raises awareness for autism. You all may know that my little man is affected by it and I think everyone could stand to learn a little more about it.

So go, read a little post and make a little comment - raise a quarter, make a difference...

Thanks so much,

I need a 'Do-Over' really, really badly!

2009-02-13T08:55:00.000-08:00

It is a given that I am no longer as clever as I thought I was.

I don't know if it's the infamous "mom brain", or getting older, or the hole in the ozone layer allowing the frying of my brain cells, or that I was just never that smart in the first place...BUT I should have known better. I really should have.

Clearly, looking back over the last few posts, even someone who doesn't know me at all, would be - like horror movie watchers yelling "don't go in the basement, stupid teenager" - advising me not to try to upgrade my (precious) phone (my only current safe connection to the outside world) by using my constantly crashing and recrashing laptop.

Unfortunately, I paid no more attention than those scantily clad girls looking for the fuse box in the (dark and scary) basement (of the imprisoned? serial killer's old house) while their boyfriends checked upstairs on the kids she was babysitting...(it is Friday the 13th, kids!)

Damn me.

I really don't know what I was thinking. The laptop seemed to be working alright. It hadn't crashed in 1/2 and hour (or so) and I managed to de-frag the drive, everything looked good.

To be honest - -Blackberry lured me in with promises of upgraded Premium software...of the amazing things my phone would be able to do when I was done...I can't even begin to describe the apps... (seriously, it turned my camera phone into a video phone. TRY to tell me that isn't cool!)

I got it all started and there was a warning page. I know, I know - a warning page! Hello!!...I did stare at it for a long time. (that's probably what did it, right there! if I hadn't wasted valuable time...)

It said that it would back up the phone, erase the phone (oh God) and then re-install.

Easy, peasey, right?

I'm sure it is no surprise to any of you that the computer crashed right in the middle of the whole process.

It's actually astounding that it never occurred to me that it might, until it happened. I'm know you guys probably saw this coming yesterday or something.

and it happened at 11:00 last night so, I had to just leave it and go to bed.

The good news is - I can still receive emails. And my phone takes video (cool!)
Bad news?
Can't send them. I have no addresses, no calender, no info at all.
No way to blog, no way to respond to comments.
I'm posting this from work right now...
so all of you out there, reading this...*sob* I love you... I miss you...I hope to be back soon...

PS: - Hubby said I can use "his" computer to post over the weekend. "His" - that's just great.

Antibiotics for my laptop?

2009-02-12T21:32:00.000-08:00

It's not looking good folks....my poor baby can't go more than 10 minutes without shutting off. Its making me crazy!!
I know I've only talked about my love for my blackberry...but my laptop love is not to be taken lightly. It has all my stuff on it- all my books, all my bloggy stuff, photos...and it is almost impossible to leave comments with my BB. I will be replying (as usual) thru email, hopefully I'll be leaving you comment love again soon!!
Sent via BlackBerry by AT&T

TMM's Slightly Inappropriate And Fully Nosey MeMe

2009-02-09T20:14:00.000-08:00

So.
I have used approximately two boxes of kleenex since yesterday...
about two pounds of cold medicine...
my nose is so red Rudolph is threatening to sue for copyright infringement...
my eyes hurt, my nose won't stop running and it feels like a cow is standing on my sinuses...

To put it bluntly, I feel like crap and I'm CRANKY...

So to celebrate, I'm doing Tattooed Minivan Mom's meme. So there.

And away we go...

1. Have you ever skipped school?

Hell yeah! Until we moved to a tiny town where my dad taught at the college. I could not fart without him knowing about it. No more skipping...

2. What is your favorite naughty word? son-of-a-bitch - all time favorite

3. Have you ever been arrested? nope, but I did get driven home by the cops once in high school after I got drunk and got in a fight with my boyfriend (small town)

4. Do you and your spouse have a code that you use when you want sex? My husband very cleverly says "wanna fool around" He's a wild one...

5. Do you have special names for....ahem...you know, either cute ones that you have your kids use or nasty ones that you and your spouse use? The adults use the real ones (for the most part), my son uses boobies and peepee. He argued with the doctor when the doctor tried to tell him it was penis. "Actually, it's called a peepee."

6. How many drinks does it take to get you sloshed? About two, I am easy and a cheep date...wanna come over? You know you want me..*wipes nose with sleeve*

7. Do you always wash your hands after you go potty or are you one of those gross people who comes out of the toilet in a public restroom and fixes their hair then leaves without washing? ALWAYS WASH MY HANDS. Always.

8. When was the last time you played the clitar, dialed 9 on a rotary phone or spanked your monkey? It's been a really long time. I'm holding out on myself until I start helping out around here. I'm tired of doing all the work...

9. What's your favorite smell that others would consider weird?

10. What's your favorite adult beverage? Gin. Oh, but I do like vodka and rum...but TMM, that means the tequila is all yours!

11. Favorite old school cartoon? Tom & Jerry

12. If you won the lottery what is the first thing you would do with the money? (If you say donate to charity you're a fucken liar. I said the FIRST thing you'd do.) Uhh...truck for hubby, finish my kitchen remodel...finally!!!

13. Have you ever fed a dog peanut butter just to see what would happen? No

14. Favorite blond joke? A blonde guy gets home early from work and hears strange noises coming from the bedroom. He rushes upstairs to find his wife naked on the bed,sweating and panting. "What's up?" he says. "I'm having a heart attack," cries the woman.
He rushes downstairs to grab the phone, but just as he's dialing, his 4-year-old son comes up and says,"Daddy! Daddy! Uncle Ted's hiding in your closet and he's got no clothes on!"
The guy slams the phone down and storms upstairs into the bedroom, past his screaming wife, and rips open the wardrobe door.
Sure enough, there is his brother, totally naked, cowering on the closetfloor.
You rotten bastard, "says the husband,"my wife's having a heart attack and you're running around naked scaring the kids!!!

15. Have you ever undressed Barbie and Ken and made them do it? Sheesh, who hasn't? I was a little surprised that Ken and GI Joe got together so quickly afterward. I think Barbie was just his beard...

16. Did you know gullible isn't in the dictionary? really? I can't believe that!

17. Shittiest car you've ever had? I thought it was shitty at the time, 1982 Jeep, I would KILL to have it back...

18. Most risque place you've ever done it? picnic table in the park
19. Most old embarrassing ass song that you just LOVE no matter what anyone thinks? I love Barry Manilow...sorry

20. Ever puked out a car window? oh yeak....ick...

21. Should I let D get an alpaca? Only if he promises that he'll never bring you the wool (or whatever it is) and ask you to knit him a sweater... Dude wants an alpaca, let him have one!

/>

PS - she also claims I could lose a bunch of followers by doing Meme...that would never happen...right??? :)

I am a bad wife.

2009-02-06T09:23:00.000-08:00

Hi, my name is Sticky and I'm a bad wife. It's true, There's no hiding it (apparently).

I let my cute little baby boy come between me & my husband ( Yes, I KNOW he's Five now, do I NEED more help?!)

I am admitting fault, I am. But it wasn't all me...we like doing things as a family. We've just always done all our things together. I don't have any huge desire to go running out to the bar (I can drink in my own house, without ever getting out of my jammies), so I just never made an effort to go out. I don't have many girlfriends and the one I do know (face to face, anyway) go to bed sadly early and don't really drink. Sigh.

Hubby goes out and plays pool. I used to as well, but I just haven't cared enough to get into it again. Maybe I should have made a bigget effort to get involved...

It is a little embarrasing to admit that tonight will be the first time Hubby and I have gone out alone since Little Dude was born.

Sad, huh.

I love my Hubby. I really do. He really is my best friend, a great hubby and daddy and that dude can fix ANYTHING! He's awesome. We do have our ups and downs (like everyone else) and there are times when I get the urge to kill him, slowly and painfully - but I would do it with love, always with love...

That being said, it has recently come to my attention *cough-hadabigfight-cough* that I have perhaps become a little neglectful in the wiferly department. WTF?!

Me?
Neglectful?
But I... uh... well, it was... but I... it's only been...

Crap.

I feel like shit. Really I do.

I can totally understand neglecting the laundry, the cleaning (I'm breeding dustbunnies to sell! I have reasons!), the nightly (ha!) home cooked meals... cuz I already neglect all that stuff, anyway. But failing to give my Baby the affection he deserves...that's just wrong.

Seriously. Don't everyone avert their eyes, I'm not just talking about sex. I'm talking about affection. I just can't imagine I have been so close minded, so focused on other things (ok, maybe a little depressed) that I didn't even notice what was going on. I really am a bad wife.

So, to make up for the errors of my ways, we are -for the very first time- dropping Junior off at Friday Night Gymnastics, and going out to dinner.

Alone.

Did I say alone? What are we going to talk about? Holy Hell, what am I going to wear? Wait, is this like a date? I'm so unprepared...

I'm all about fixin' my ways. Anybody out there have any advice for me? I know I was all crackin' jokes up there, but I do feel really badly about this.
Anyone else ever let their lives just take everything over?
Ever lose sight of the good things you have in the face of your daily chaos?
I would love to hear about it...

(and what do you think - the sexy panties, right?)

"Bullets in My Lunch Box" or "Why I need more therapy, Oprah"

2009-02-04T16:50:00.000-08:00

UPDATE:

I had a great talk with AJ's teacher (who was totally appalled about the bullet) and she spoke with the other parents. It was a one time incident that mom discovered the same way I did. Anyhow, they have taken care of the problem, will not happen again - very embarrased and apologetic...
And the class had a talk about "dangerous things"

I already bitched about this on Secret Spineless Whine, but I'm just so shocked that I'm totally whining here too...

I'll start from the beginning (lucky you, I know)...

I picked Mister up from his wonderful Montessori Preschool at 2:30, as usual. Got home and we decided that we wanted to play some Wii games. As I sat him on my lap, I felt something hard in his back pocket. Pulled it out thinking it was a pen or a crayon or something and what I found was one of these...

Yep, it's the ever popular .300 Winchester Magnum.

"The .300 Win Mag is a cartridge for large game hunting and long-range shooting. It sees use in long-range benchrest competition and has been adopted by Law Enforcement Marksman and by a few specific branches of the US Military for use by their snipers."

Thank you so much, Wikipedia.

I called the Hubby. Wanted to make sure it was actually REAL before I called the school in hysterics or IF I should bother to call the school in hysterics...

One thing I can count on from hubby...when I'm unsure about something he can pick up the slack! Turns out the bullet is real and is he ever pissed off.

According to Junior, a kid at school ( for safety's sake let's call him Spike) brought in 2 of these and they were playing airplane on the playground with them. Spike told Junior he could "take it home and keep it forever and ever."

Nice. Sharing, that's what they're teaching in school these days...

Of course he was thrilled - he's five, he loves guns and shit. He doesn't know. We had a nice loooong talk - and another when Dad got home. After Hubby got thru explaining (to me) what could have happened with a bullet like that, I felt sick to my stomach.

What I would really like to hear is your reactions. Am I over reacting? Under-reacting? What should I expect from the school? From the other parents? Anything?

Should I just let it go? I need some advice.

Oh Hell No!

2009-02-02T20:44:00.000-08:00

Have you seen the Dairy Queen commercial with the animated shrimp eating popcorn (shrimp)?

Dairy Queen (I cannot figure out how to get it on the page, sorry)

The deal is that that the Mom and the Dad shrimp are eating this awesome popcorn which turns out to be their own baby shrimp..nice, huh?

I've laughed it a little, but AJ just saw it tonight and has spent the last 3 hours asking me if the shrimp were eating their babies and why. "Why, why, why would those shrimp eat their poor little babies...why???"

I imagine most of you are like my hubby, laughing your asses off from a safe distance...(I know where you sleep, buddy)

And I do realize it's really kind of funny, in a twisted sort of way...but dude will NOT.GO.TO BED!!

"the poor little shrimpies, Mama...are they dead now? Are they sad?"

Guess who's going to bed with me....? *sigh*

In need of bloggy love...

2009-02-02T18:40:00.000-08:00

Please take a minute to visit Yummy Mummy and leave her some love. She could really use it...

Some Auntie Lyn Love

2009-02-02T17:54:00.000-08:00

Sorry we missed the date...

We were thinking about you, tho. AJ asks all the time (9 times a day, at least) when you're coming to visit! We are SO excited!!

Any excuse to drop his pants...

2009-02-02T08:47:00.000-08:00

I just called AJ's school. I forgot to tell them about his huge, swollen, nasty leg and I thought I should tell them - you know, just in case (so they didn't think I was some awful mom, beating him or something - I'm paranoid).

Turns out - it was totally unnecessary.

It's always a bad sign when the director of the school bursts out laughing as soon as she hears my voice. (don't even ask why she knows me by voice). Turns out Mister had already dropped trow in class. They tried to convince him to pull his pants back up, but he insisted that he needed to tell everyone "what happens when you are five".

She said it was hysterical listening to a bunch of 5 year olds telling their "doctor office war stories".

Luckily, mine was the only kid with exposure issues. Sigh.

I'm not really a moron...

2009-02-01T20:21:00.000-08:00

I just kind of look like one right now...

It's all my own fault. I realize that. It all started right before Christmas when I decide to try to be organized (should have known then, that it would all end badly).

Flashback to the 15th of December. Through my bank's Bill Pay, I scheduled my mortgage payment to go out on the 1st of January. My thinking was that will the holidays and all I would be really busy and this way I wouldn't have to worry.

You can see where I'm going with this, can't you?

Yep. Paid it twice.

The good news is that I don't have to pay it again until March...the bad news is that we don't really have a bunch of extra money just lying around waiting to be overspent.

So, I panicked, briefly...and then did what I had to do to cover my ass. Luckily for my dumb ass, I had a credit card that was almost paid off, with a 0% interest offer. Bonus! I wrote myself a check and all was well.

Flash-forward to Friday. Grabbed the mail out of the mailbox after picking AJ up from school. I had a hour before his 5 year check up and shot festival. Now, I don't want to give you the wrong idea about me, but I know what it looks like when the bank sends an overdraft notice - and I was holding one in my sweaty little hand.
"damn it" How was that even possible? I know I had everything covered!

I won't bore you with a long dialogue about the bank phone calls, the credit card company calls and the two visits to the bank I had to make...I'll just tell you that is was my fault (again). I had $40 left on the credit card I used to fix my bank account. And the $10 payment that was due? I paid it 3 days late. So they refused the check. By the time I even found out about it (no notification from bank or CC Comp.) I had $295 in late fees, a $19 fee from the returned check from the bank and $39 from the CCC, and my account was -$550. HOLY CRAP.

Luckily for me, the bank was extremely helpful and refunded the fees. Hubby was not quite as understanding, but once i explained it was fixed (again) he wasn't too mad.

Everything is all straightened out, but I feel like a HUGE moron. I'm normally much better at managing "things", really I am.

Do you even want to hear about the doctors appointment? It was all good, except the screaming(no, not mine, although I might have had a tear or two). The problems came the following day (yeah, I had a great weekend) I guess that the Tetanus/Diphtheria vaccine can cause a bad reaction after the fourth shot (guess which one we just got?).

Little man's leg was HUGE. It didn't seem to bother him, but Hubby and I were going a little crazy watching the huge red hot lump in his leg!

It's much better tonight.

So, a fresh start to a new week...hopefully with fewer moronic moments...

Random Friday

2009-01-30T11:13:00.000-08:00

Have I mentioned my addiction to American Idol? No? Well, I missed it last night. I was assisting in a cooking class, titled "Everything Bacon".
In case you are curious, the answer to the eternally asked question - "can you ever have too much bacon?" is yes. I, personally draw the line at chocolate and bacon cupcakes. I have heard of chocolate dipped bacon, but have yet to actually eat it. Last night's cupcakes were perfect - except for the bacon. I don't mind salty with my sweet, but add in chewy and I was just lost. Ick... sorry. I will be making that same recipe without the bacon, tho - very nice.

JJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJ

I saw on the news this morning (very briefly) that the lady that just have the octuplets already has 6 other kids...AND her husband is going back Iraq??!!
Now don't get all mad, I think people can have as many kids as they want (kinda) but who goes and pays for artificial insemination when you already have 6 kids and your hubby is gone? Is this why so little information has been released about the mother? I just think that's a little crazy...

JJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJ

AJ and I are going in for his 5 year check up today. Can you say shots?! This should be a fun one. The question is - do I warn him ahead of time? We have an hour and a half between school and the doctor, do we discuss shots? Will bribery work? Do I promise ice cream if he's brave and doesn't make me hold him down?

JJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJ

All the troll-y bloggy comment haters are pissing me off. I barely have enough time to figure out my own life...how do you people find the time to judge someone else's life? As far as I can see we are all here (in the blogaverse) for some type of release; to get something off of our chests, to share our souls, to try to find a way to get thru our days with humor and some sort of dignity (or at least to share the madness with others who can understand). We are trying to laugh to share and to bond with others like us (stuffed away in a dark corner where our kids can't find us, trying to type to the light from our screens) - Why the hate? Why the judgement?

Is it so important to be the 'right' one, the 'good' one? the 'perfect' one?

Does it help anyone? Do you really think calling someone 'evil' or the 'world's worst mother' changes anything or makes anyone better? Are they going to read your comment and think "you know, I think I'll stop giving my kids whiskey shots before bed so they'll go right to sleep and I can update my blog..." (I only did that once, so hush) No. Nothing is going to change - you are just adding hate to the universe and my universe has way too much of it already.

My mama said "if you can't say something nice, shut the hell up!"(she also said "if you are old enough to get a hickey, you are old enough to get it where it doesn't show..." but that doesn't really apply and we should discuss that later).

If you can't laugh along - go AWAY.

JJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJ

Are you watching the Superbowl? More importantly - what are you eating?? I have a whole menu plannned...I'm so excited...

The one where Sticky is grateful...

2009-01-27T20:12:00.000-08:00

What a great week!! (and it's only Tuesday!!)

Do you see my new design? Do you? Do you?

Is it not Be-u-tee-full???? I know, I know...how could you NOT be jealous?

The Lovely and Talented Rachel of Blog Candy Designs worked patiently and tirelessly to create this for me. And the poor thing had to put up with like 8 million questions from me and she has that early pregnancy tiredness going on...(congrats again)

Anyhow, she is wonderfully talented and most reasonably priced, although I think she's booked up right now, but keep her in mind!! You won't be sorry!!

And...my blog is on Alltop!! I know, I know...but I'm really excited about it...

And last, but definitely not least (stop reading now, Auntie Lyn) I won my very first giveaway!!

Samantha at temporarily me dot com wrote a hysterical post about vibrators and it was a giveaway. Of course I had to comment, but imagine my shock and surprise when I won! Who would have guessed someone called Sticky could win a vibrator on a blog post. You should have heard the hubby laugh!!

Of course now he wants to know what else I can win...!!

I have so many things to be happy about today, thank you to everyone who made it a wonderful day!

(it really is pretty, isn't it?!)

I wanna play too...

2009-01-26T20:20:00.000-08:00

Having dinner tonight. Just me and Little Junior Troll (it's a term of endearment, I swear).

Anyhow...

In an attempt to make adult conversation, I asked "what was your favorite thing in school today?"

He replied, "Playing with my friends."

As the mom of a kid on the autism spectrum, any mention of friends or playing with others and I am thrilled!

Extremely interested, I asked "What did you play and who did you play with?"

"House" he answered. "But not the mommy daddy kind - Doctor House"

Holy Hell!! "Well, who were you? Who did you play with?"

"I wanted to be House's Assistant. But Kendra said I had to be House"

"So, what did you do?"

"I yelled at her, zipped her up and then she was all better."

(my little fantasies have never included being House's mom, but hey, at least we're playing with the same characters!)

Joy

2009-01-25T22:07:00.000-08:00

I found this wonderful site (at Deana's blog, Domestic Chicky, she has taught me so much),
I Heart Faces. They run photo contests and I love just looking at all faces, they are amazing. and the photography so inspirational...

I am entering for the first time with the photo below...

Whadda ya think?

Before Childbirth Ruined My Boobs...

2009-01-25T19:28:00.000-08:00

I used to be a good drinker. Hubby and I would go out on a Friday night and I could stay out for hours; drinking, playing pool - actually talking to people. Before that, when I was working full time, I could drink all night and get right up the next morning and go to work again. It wasn't so much that I could drink a huge amount (well...sometimes) but I knew how to pace myself, I just knew how to drink.

Flash forward to this Saturday night. Date night with hubby in the garage (I know,,,SO romantic). We play pool, have drinks and I let him pretend to pick me up (just kidding, we only did that once. Ok, twice) My point is...and I'm getting there...I open a beer and I drink it. No really, just stand there, holding it and drink the whole thing. Not in a beer bong/shotgun kind of way, but just sort of drink after drink after -"hey, where did the beer go" kind of way. Needless to say, it takes no time at all to get loaded.

Granted, that usually makes things pretty fun (or funny -depending on your point of view), but when we put junior to bed at 8 and I'm passing out at 9:30? Not so much fun...sigh. And I won't even get in to the hangover I had this morning...ugly.

You know, I used to be good at a lot of things...

I used to be really good at talking to people and listening to people (and by people, I mean people over 5 years old.). I used to have a lot of friends...

I do have internet friends, don't I? And ya'll really are my friends, right? You would have told me that having a baby (at 38) would pretty much permanently ruin my body, right?

Cuz, you know what? Those B*&%$s never warned me. Seriously. I was all, "why are my feet getting so big?" I totally thought they went back to the old size. Not.
And the boobs. Really, the boob thing hurt the worst. It was my own fault. Hubris. That damned pride thing. God has a warped sense of humor and he knows just where to push the buttons. I will admit I was overly proud of the boobies.

I used to be able to hold up a sweater pretty well. You will have to take my word for it, that it was a really nice rack. Unfortunately, they went from a firm, perky C to a Double D in about a week. Ouch. Really, really ouch. And again...not back to the old size. Not even close. And worse, I didn't even get to breast feed. Totally wasted.

It isn't like I would go back and NOT be pregnant, not really...

No, I wouldn't...kidding...Ha Ha...not for some silly ole boobs...no, no...that's crazy talk...

Oh hell, I wouldn't. But it is fun to think about.

Anything you used to be good at? Or ruined parts? Please tell me I'm not the only one...!

Oriental Cabbage Salad

2009-01-21T21:08:00.000-08:00

This was amazingly yummy! I have heard of this salad, but never had one...

Ingredients

2 tablespoons soy sauce
1/4 cup cider vinegar
1/2 cup sugar
1/2 cup oil (I throw in a little sesame oil too)
1/2 tsp red pepper flakes (can be omitted)
2 cloves garlic, crushed
1/2 tsp grated ginger

1 head napa or regular cabbage, clean and chop (the one in the photo is regular cabbage)
1 bunch green onion
1/2 cup chopped carrots
1 cup bean sprouts (or whatever extra veggies you have lying around, i threw in some cucumbers)

1/4 cup sesame seed
1/4 cup sliced or slivered almonds
2 packages ramen noodles
1 tablespoon oil

Directions

Combine soy sauce, vinegar, sugar, oil, red pepper, garlic and ginger in a small saucepan and cook over low heat until sugar dissolves.

Remove from heat and cool.
Can be made a day in advance,) Refrigerate until ready to use.

Break up Ramen noodles thoroughly (discard seasoning packets or save them for another use). Saute noodles, almonds and sesame seeds in oil until they brown. (be very careful not to burn)
(you can roast these without oil if you have a nonstick pan and keep a close eye on it)

Stir often.
Remove from heat.

Combine cabbage, onions, carrots, bean sprouts and noodle mixture.
Toss with the dressing about 20 minutes before serving (this allows the noodles to soften).

enjoy

I refuse...

2009-01-21T20:41:00.000-08:00

It isn't that I'm too lazy...
it isn't that I don't know how...
It isn't that I don't care or don't think its important...

But something always goes wrong.

I hate getting my oil changed.
I hate having my tires rotated.
I hate "scheduled maintenance" and "alerts".

Today my (smarter than me) car informed me that we had a flat. Please understand, I have been told this before, turned out to be nothing. So I drove it until it became apparent that I really did have a flat. Crap. Called hubby "Do it". Crap. No way out of doing it. Crap, crap, crap...

So, off I went to the tire store. Got the dog out of the car, gave my keys to the nice man and waited...

It only took about 25 minutes and the nice man said they found a nail, fixed the hole and I could be on my way - free of charge! Sweet! Called hubby - "I told you so" Fine, whatever.

...amazing...

Off I went. Finished my errands. Strangely, right before I got to AJ's school, I was once again informed that I had a flat tire. Huh? It's only been 20 minutes since I got it fixed!

I got out at the school and bent down to take a look - I could actually HEAR the air leaking out. WTH?! I can't believe this and it's 2:30, I'm hungry and I just want to get off the road and go home. Called hubby - "Go to the tire store, NOW. Go now"

Fine. Off to the next tire store (same place, different location)> This time dog and kid and 45 minutes later. This time it cost me because the "valve stem was broken". Fine. Whatever. Kid had had enough, dog had had enough, I was DONE at the tire store. (and yes, I cursed my sweet hubby under my breath my entire way home).

Hubby gets home. Yells at me. (no doubt - at me!) It (evidently)should have been apparent to me that the first tire store broke the valve and I should never have been charged. I wasn't in any mood to argue - in fact I would have paid more just to be able to go home!

Hubby is going to call tomorrow and complain.

I hate getting my oil changed.
I hate having my tires rotated.
I hate "scheduled maintenance" and "alerts".

Something always goes wrong...

Internets, meet Rex...

2009-01-20T22:30:00.000-08:00

Thank you, Santa

(sshhhh...wordless wednesday)